I actually didnt really realize it until today when I saw Kelly0412's 20 most vile group game players blog. It took me a moment to think about it but afterwards I have come to the conclusion that I was ultimately groomed.
I joined tengaged when I was 14 (6 years ago) and I was young, dumb and just in love with Survivor and I met Me2013 in my first ever group game. We were on the same tribe and hit it off well. I liked talking to her and hearing about her job (as working with kids is something I wanted to do and am now doing it) and she waa very interested in my life being 14 and over the years she would use my age to her benefit emotionally.
Throughout that game (and many others over the years) I was gaslighted into thinking screw ups were my fault and I wasnt a good person. There was alot of emotional manipulation where her paranoia would convince me to believe I was causing it and it really was my paranoia. Survivor of course is a game focused on paranoia but the way she used it against me and to keep me in her corner even after games was something else.
Within those games and conversations there was slight subtext of sexuality. Even though I am not interested in the slightest I do think that was a contributing factor to try to control me and looking back on past conversations, It makes me feel really uncomfortable now not even knowing stuff like this was happening. This was at a very dark part in my life where I was extremely depressed in my real life and used Tengaged as an outlet to at least escape from all that was going on and in reality, I think this and other stuff was contributing to my depression.
Time has changed and I am way past it now and I love my job and where im currently at in life (albit really currently) and even though I found out a majority of this happened today, I can look back and ignore alot of whaf happened.
