So hey y'all, I'm going to try to keep this short but I'm an English lit major and I tend to ramble.
Anyways, I honestly didn't ever expect to even play this series. Zac basically begged Chris and I to join an hour before the game started and I enjoyed his hosting in TAR and felt like I could at least be a buffer and help him fill up his cast and why not!
Basically nothing of significance happened till the Top 12 besides me winning my way into power but then came the moment where I slowly began to feel like I was snapped! The dreaded social comp made a return, and as I had basically no allies, I pretty much felt like Evan/I were doomed from the second the comp started and was highkey annoyed at all my effort going to waste just to get 12th. However, I managed to beg and plead with Max (knowing Chris would always save me) to give me his save despite Silver telling him the complete opposite and somehow managed to stay!
The next double eviction was uneventful except me returning the favor to Max and giving him my save and tragically lost Ross, aka one of the few people who would actually speak to me and felt like who had my back. ):
Then the moment came where I KNEW I was snapped. Basically, Silver/I had never saw eye to eye, and I was like "oh wow survivor is finally my time to take him out!" and basically was like in our group chat, hey guys (which in hindsight was super dumb of me since Garret/Silver were a TAR team and both on Zac's BB production thing) let's all get rid of silver! and everyone was like okay yay! and then max got voted out 5-3 which made me SUPER pissed off because
1) max was the entire reason i stayed and i legit owed him my game and wanted to go far with him
2) ryan had deadass lied to my face for no reason!
anyways i went psycho and was pretty much over the game at this point, i hadnt been able to connect with anyone friendwise, everyone i had considered an ally was usually blindsided the round they went home, and the one person i thought was my 100% had lied to me for no reason. i felt like i was going to be the next target no matter what, and i wanted chris to not be carried down by me so i resigned myself to just going home and hoping by not rocking anything, he could make a semi-decent run and maybe make the finale.
that turned out to be BAD when chris decided to campaign to save me and ended up being made a target himself and went home
#yikes =[
final 6, everyone suddenly was like "oh wow jonah is a big threat" and silver and i briefly came to terms and actually agreed to work with each other! i was about to lock in my vote when suddenly, i was being re-added to the group chat and being snapped at, and as i probably showed, when im confronted with stuff that isnt true, i go OFF, so basically despite having virtually no alliances, i still managed to go psycho in a group chat and escape the tribal without even get a vote! while i did want to originally stick to the split vote plan i thought of, i just thought it was too risky to move forward to final 5 with a confirmed duo (silver/garret) who felt little to no loyalty to me, and decided to crack everyone's alliances to worm my way through!
final 5 was ryan lying to me for no reason 2.0 and tris went home despite me trying to get silver out for like the 20th time, it rly was tragic alexa play not ready to make nice by the dixie chicks
and then final 4, basically the christian v silver war that had been going on finally came to a culmination! i managed to make amends with ryan and convince him/jonah that silver was a bigger threat to take to the end than me and i made final 3 and avoid the tiebreaker scenario (altho im pretty sure i would've won, still best to not have to go there at all!)
in closing, i know i was a very loud, brash, and probably unlikable person throughout a majority of this season. i struggled to make connections with people, and wasn't really able to pull off
#bigmovez! like my opponents were able to. however, the one thing i do pride myself on is my ability to SURVIVE. i didnt need to win every immunity to make it here. i was able to worm my way through this game, and in such a high tense season, playing an anti-game was able to work rly well for me! i never expected to be able to make final 3 after being on the bottom of this game virtually the entire time, so no matter what im proud of myself for maybe not being able to thrive as well as i'd like, but embracing what it means to be able to survive!
good luck ryan and jonah!