HEY BITCHEZ ITS ME PARIS, IM GONNA RELEASE MY FOURTHHH AUTOBIOGRAPHY, AS YOU MAY ALREADY KNOW THE LAST FEW MONTHS HAS BEEN HELL FOR ME, I ACTUALLY LOST MY FAME AND FORTUNE BASICALLY PEOPLE FORGOT ABOUT ME AND I WASNT FAMOUS ANYMORE, I'VE ALWAYS WROTE MY BOOKS ABOUT WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE A STAR BUT MY NEW BOOK WILL BE ABOUT HOW LIFE WAS AFTER DA FAME, I WILL TALK ABOUT HOW I WOULD SIGN ON THE DOLE ON A TUESDAY MORNING AND GO FOR A MCMUFFIN LATER ON, ALSO I WILL TALK ABOUT HOW I HAD TO GET ME TAN FROM HOME BARGAINS AND CALL UP DA PAPPARAZZI AND TELL THEM I WAS LEAVING POUNDLAND AT 3 BUT NOBODY WOULD COME, I DECIDED TO MAKE A COMEBACK BUT I NEEDED A PLAN, PARIS HAD ALWAYS BEEN A BITCH SHE NEEDED TO SHOW SOME RESPECT SO SHE DECIDED TO HELP OUT AT THE LOCAL ANIMAL SHELTER BUT GOT SACKED BECAUSE THEY GOT ME TO WASH THE CATS BUT I DIDNT KNOW THEY WERENT COMPACTABLE WITH DA STAFF DISH WASHER INIT ALSO I WILL TALK ABOUT MY NEW CAREER AS A TV PRESENTER AND HOW IM IN TALKS WITH MY VERY OWN SHOW, I IZ GONNA BE THE NEXT OPRAH, IM GONNA HELP PEOPLE LIKE LARRY WHO IS GAY MAN BUT HASNT COME OUT TO HIS PARENTS WE'RE GONNA PAY FOR HIM TO HAVE A SEX CHANGE AND USE HIS MOTHER'S BANK CARD TO PAY FOR THE COSTS, I CANT WAIT :D
WINNN A GIFT!