Trust. Is only something that comes along through growth and time. It's not something that appeared overnight for a reason. Trust is something you handle with delicacy, in which most don't. The word and meaning of "trust" has become a lot like "love." Love over time has become greatly skewed, like "trust." People tend to throw these words around with either an immature concept if the feeling, or just throw it out there and around without and true meaning behind it.
"Love" has become a fad. Something that comes and leaves; without concern of whether or not it will ever come back again. I can honestly say I've only "fallen in love" once. Just once. Falling is exactly what happened. It felt amazing falling. All the butterflies I'd get in my stomach just to hear the sound of his voice, or a touch from his hand. People don't understand, what goes up must come down. They don't understand that if it doesn't hurt like hell when you hit the ground, then you were never truly in love. You won't be sad for about a day and move on. It kills you from the inside out. You never forget what you shared with that person. Love is agony in anyway you look at it. People INSIST they're in love, when they really have no idea what goes into "being in love," or going out. You never really fall out of love. There are no replacements. There is no forgetting. You know when you've been in love when that hurt carries onto affect every single decision you make. When you take steps back to realize that things aren't worth putting your heart into.
That's where trust and love tie into one another.
Love is built off of trust. If they're both fake then how can you get anything out of either of them? When you put your trust in someone, it's supposed to be something that's dependable. Something you shouldn't regret doing the next day, or five minutes later. As we all know, NOTHINGS ever as it "should" be. This "trust" thing isn't something that you can depend on anymore. Well not me at least. This word, this "meaning" is simply jaded. Just like "love." People have no meaning behind this thick mask that they stand behind everytime they speak. Only in a perfect world, everyone would be themselves without this mask we put on. We all have our own reasons, our own stories. But, we refuse to take that mask off that hides everything true behind it. And for that reason alone, I no longer acknowledge either of these two words.
People have always wondered why this glass wall is around me. Easily broken, never repaired, usually invisible. It's due to those two little words.
Im sitting here thinking about so much shit. I am thinking about how I might move back home.
I'm sick of dealing with everything down here. Its like a whole other world. Fuck laguna beach, bring that shit to tengaged and you'll have the ratings of the century. It would make the perfect show. You have all the drama, the backstabbing, the gossip, the friends fucking friends and friends fucking friends girlfriends/boyfriends. A bunch of underage drinkers and some drug selling, a little insurance fraud and you're a fucking millionaire.
I should bottle up this shit and sell it to the WB. Seriously. Its just the most frustrating place to live in all of the world. Well I dont know about that but moving down here from somewhere normal makes people here look like they couldn't survive without pain, lies, hurt, love, sex, and everything else that should be inside panora's box.
Also, everyone knows everyone by association but none of its good. Its all "she said, he said" bullshit. Back home if you had a problem you just got int someones face and said what was on your mind. Here its all behind your back shit, like everyone has a knife just waiting to stab you with it. Hell if thats me, I'll tell you exactly how I feel and I dont care if you want to talk shit about me, have fun. I'm glad i'm the center of your world - its flattering.
The girls are all whores. If you're not a virgin more than likely if you live in the tengaged world you're a whore. Not saying theres anything wrong with that, because hell I used to be one when I was young and stupid too. But the people down here arent even safe or respectful about it. This girl might fuck you, your best friend and your older brother. At least have some class for yourself.
And the guys! The guys are almost worse. Guys down here will fuck anything with a pussy. Its like wow shes hot, why dont I fuck her. His friend might have already done her but he'll do her too, maybe at the same time. Yeah its in all the porn you watch but come on now, do you really want to be telling your future wife that you once had a gang bang? It may be fun now but there comes a time where you need to grow up and look for girls who dont want to fuck you with their friend in the bed too.
Lastly, nobody should take offence to this. I'm not trying to point anyone out or make someone feel bad about themselves. If you read this and feel bad then maybe its something to do with how you feel about yourself. I'm not sitting here saying I do no wrong but at least I have the balls to say it out loud
First girl voted out Latina. She was voted out for good reason. Going into a girls challenge without consulting the other girls is beyond uncalled for and not right. Consult your fellow girls if you want to post a blog as a challenge.
Now that theres a challenge two over HALF you girls aren't competing?? This frustrates me!! Seriously..UGH
So I'm bored and feel like talking..ask me ANY question you want. I'll answer it.
My question to everyone is..Why are people so quiet about who they neg? If you aren't in an alliance and you just dont want to go. Be forward about it and be like I'm negging you because its you or me. Seriously..be honest!!!!!!
I've told people why I neg them. Either in private or in the forum..why cant you?
Gah!!!!
No I'm not whining about being negged. I just want to know why your doing it. Be like oh because this persons doing it if you want. TELL THE TRUTH!!!!!!!
PS. I <3 Dina I <3 Holy I <3 Bridgette I <3 Amy I <3 Lulz
I love game 7447
