Okay so I've been dating this guy for about 4 months. We met after I was phasing through a dark patch of my life, and at first, I was reluctant to letting him in. After a few weeks, I ended up giving him a chance and I, for real, have NEVER been this happy and comfortable with a human being in my entire life.
Fast forward a couple of months, we fought. The fight was instigated by the fact that I was dealing with personal issues, and instead of addressing them to him, I bottled them up. I did that because I was aware he had his fair share of issues and I didn't wanna lay it all onto him. I tried to digest my feelings and past issues (if you know me, you know I have a SHIT life, no exaggeration) so I could invest more in the relationship, but he struck a nerve because I told him to stay home last Sunday instead of coming to see me.
Anyway, he called me and broke up with me impulsively. I was like, so in shock because we've never had any arguments or toxic issues in our relationship before that night. I blew up, and it pushed him back, confirming his decision rather than talking about it.
I'm honestly really like, sad because he's helped me a lot regaining confidence and re-touching with myself, and I can't let go because he's given me way too much positivity compared to the few negatives.
After all of that, we remain friends and have talked every day since the breakup. Although, he's really scared and keeps confirming that his decision is not something he regrets, which makes me so fucking upset.
Anyway, I'm friends with his friends. We all used to hang out, and we still do despite everything. My boyf- well, ex, is a very reserved person and I think his issues derive from not knowing people care about him. It's a really touchy thing.
I miss him a lot. Today we talked a lot more than the past days, and we even hung out with his friends yesterday, and we talked briefly about his problems, which was weird... because we had eye-contact yesterday, and we're used to being over each other, so not having that was odd.
I'm trying to let him know I care, and I regret that I reacted impulsivement and hurt him, because it PAINS me to see him feel sad.
What's worst is that he doesn't talk about anything to anyone. He's that reserved. But today, he opened up a bit to me about how his issues made him grow and he feels like he doesn't need anyone to take care of him, because he can take care of himself like he's always done, which made me CRY but I couldn't let him know, duh...
Anyway, he knows I feel bad and I want him again, but like, I have no fucking clue what to do.
SOMEONE HELP I KNOW THIS IS LONG BUT Y'ALL ARE GONNA BE NEUTRAL ABOUT IT.
I feel like if you both opened up to eachother you'd have more of a better and more open relationship because it seems like (as you stated) both of you are very bottled up with your feelings and don't want to show them.
SharonMaItems That's what I thought too. Except I cried when I saw him for the first two times, post break-up. And I could tell he was holding back tears too, and he's told me stuff like it was hurting him that he hurt me, and he feels guilty about the whole thing.
I wouldn't ask him again when you guys are both so depressed at the moment, and instead that you should work your way back up to become better friends. I think if you are able to get him to open up about his problems then you can help him and yourself.
Unless y'all don't like eachother.. but it shows that y'all like eachother from your comments so I think you should give it a try and just play the waiting game.
Awww I am sooo sorry. :( Honestly I feel the best thing to do is to stay friends with him because if you're both really reserved, you'll both gradually open up to each other once you trust each other more. You guys aren't ready to be in a relationship with each other right now, but once you are fully open with one another, you guys can definitely try dating again and hopefully the outcome is much better.
I think you just need to sit down and have a real, authentic, heart to heart conversation. I think its fixable if you two really like each other <3. Good luck.
eeek you can’t be friends with an ex, so if he don’t want you cry for a few days listen to sad songs and be in ur feels <33333 acting desp and constantly messaging him will only annoy him more + your embarrassing yourself, act like you don’t care and see if he messages you :)
based on how you described him, I can relate a lot to him. make sure you don't irritate him by messaging him too much and instead wait for him to approach you first. if things were meant to be, he'll reach out and want to have more meaningful, less guarded conversations slowly but surely. However, you can't force him to open up if he's not feeling it. With that being said, I definitely wouldn't just eliminate him from your life if things dont lead back to a romantic relationship, just be friends and accept it for what it is.
listen if its not meant to be, you'll find someone else. There's a lot of other guys out there and while this guy changed you for the better, its because he was meant to be at that time. You'll find another guy who will just as easily make you feel happy and clutch your pearls and know the exact spot that makes you want to scream in spanish
Being friends with an ex is fine, but the exception is the exact situation you're currently in now. Both of you still have feelings. He needs to work on his issues and you need to do the same. Sorry this happened to you :/
god i love u so fucking much!!!!! you are a LOT and that's what makes you so fucking special. and if you can communicate all your weird shit with him then great but honestly u need a man who will give you back all your craziness and match you and be like "yeah i'm a psycho too im gonna play roblox and listen to rita ora" bc those things make you perfect. i hope ur doing okay and snap me if u need any support sista!!!!
