This site uses cookies. If you continue to browse the site, we shall assume that you accept the use of cookies.
Big Brother and online Hunger games.

[TUTORIAL] How to be a good Butcher.

Oct 13, 2009 by BengalBoy
imageBeing a butcher isn’t always easy, but I always treat my meat right and I never go about acting like I own the gaff.
                   
Hi, I’m Fred Elliot. I’ve been a butcher on Coronation Street for years with our lad Ashley, and I thought you might want an insight in to my exciting career.
                 
The day usually starts at 8AM. I open the butcher shop and check all the meat’s ok. Our lad Ashley usually comes in about 9AM. We both have our uniforms, and, suffice to say, mine is a bit larger than our Ashley’s.
                     
It’s usually about lunchtime we start getting customers. Usually just all the regulars, our Gail, our Deirdre, our Sean, they all love a bit of meat (especially Sean, but that’s another matter). Our Ashley kid is especially good with the customers.
                   
Being a butcher is much harder work than you might think, we don’t just slash up pieces of meat. We have to order it, stock it, make sure it’s all fresh then sell it. If the meat goes off, we can’t just call some bloke to come and fix it. But, to be honest with you, sometimes we just cut the bad bits off.
               
Of course, being a butcher does have it’s advantages. We always get nice ladies looking for a piece of meat. We get a lot of customers, more individual parties going on. Better social life. It’s very enjoyable.
             
Fred Elliot interviewed by Ashley Peacock
           
Ashley: So, uncle Fred, what’s your favourite thing about being a butcher?
           
Fred: Well Ashley, I say well Ashley, I like seeing the regulars of Coronation Street everyday and I love the smell of a nice juicy sausage.
             
Ashley: What’s your advice to anyone who wants to be a butcher?
         
Fred: Well, I say, always work on the porkchops, I say, always work on the porkchops!
             
Ashley: [laughs] That’s our Fred! Always the comedian! So, if you didn’t go in to the butchering industry what would you be doing now?
                   
Fred: Well, I’ve always fancied myself as a bit of a fighter. Once when I was younger the school bully stole my dinner money, I say the school bully stole my dinner money! I told the teacher and he gave it back. I was really proud of myself. So, I think if I wasn’t a butcher I would be in the ring right now. But I prefer to take out my aggression by chopping up meat.
                 
Ashley: Do you sometimes get stressed, working in such a high voltage area, so to speak?
               
Fred: Well our Ashley, I say well our Ashley. I do love all the gossip, but sometimes things do get a bit too much here. Still, I wouldn’t leave Coronation Street for the world.
                 
Ashley: So Fred, a lot of the ladies have been asking: are you single?
                     
Fred: [laughs] I knew this one would come up, I say I knew this one would come up! But hands off the merchandise ladies, I’ve got my eyes on someone right now.
               
Ashley: Thanks Fred, you’re a great sport.
           
Fred: No problem our Ashley!

Comments

http://www.tengaged.com/design/id-10981/tood
Sent by blues,Oct 13, 2009
+++++
Sent by FrankTurner,Oct 13, 2009
Fred is dead though :(
Sent by RiDsTeR,Oct 13, 2009
This blog makes me hungry
Obligatory spam:
http://www.tengaged.com/design/id-10881/octopus-hat
http://www.tengaged.com/design/id-10780/swirly-demon
Sent by Skoffin,Oct 13, 2009
lol too much 2 read
Sent by blogs,Oct 13, 2009

Leave a comment