I can’t even lie
- I feel so disconnected from everything. Family, friends, work, hobbies, even here. Everything feels so gray and empty. I have tried and tried and tried to work towards a better place mentally, but I’m feeling like such a prisoner of my own mind. I feel so embarrassed even blogging this shit but I have to get it out and I’d rather a bunch of randoms online see me struggle than the people I actually know. I’m scared to reach out to people that I’m close to because I don’t want to be just another burden on their mind. I don’t have access to the resources I usually would due to the circumstances I’m in currently. I feel trapped, alone, and scared. It feels like my life is slipping through my fingers and I’m losing my grip and desire to hang on more and more each day. I just want peace. I want my mind to not run a mile a minute. I want to be able to relax and not be so wound up. None of that seems possible anymore and it feels more and more out of reach each day.
Please reach out to your friends, please check in on them and please remember to be kind to one another. The saying “you never know what someone is going through” has been beaten to death but it’s true. As shitty as this website can be, I’m sure a lot of people use it as an escape from the life they’re living.
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