Serious topic. Not asking for myself, obviously, but for someone who is in this situation and I feel like there are people on here better equipped to deal with this than me.
My friend is not very close with either of his parents, and currently lives with his grandma but does see and talk to his dad regularly. Tonight he was showing his dad an email on his phone, and while his dad was holding his phone, friends boyfriend texted him a bunch of heart emoji, and obviously has a male name.
My friend is freaking out because his dad has not said anything to him since then, and he had not been planning to come out and isn't ready with what he wants to say. Even if he doesn't acknowledge anything now, his dad may likely tell Grandma.
Any possible advice for what to do when you feel obligated to come out before you're ready would be appreciated.
Comments
in my experience tackling it head-on helps. just sit down with him and have that conversation
I mean, I don't think heart emojis are an indicator you're bi/gay personally. If his friend said something else more direct, maybe it would be different. I really don't think he needs to worry. He should come out when he's ready and if his dad asks about it, he could totally blow it off or open up to him--his decision.
I think this depends on if this person feels ready to talk about it yet. He could choose to not come out, choose to come out but not have a conversation about it, or choose to come out and explain his place. It honestly depends on his place in his own journey, but also I would recommend he talk with his boyfriend about it, too. Coming out is a very intense process and they should also ask themselves if they鈥檙e ready to come out together in the public eye :) Overall, though, just remember the best piece of advice is to try to come out in a way that connects you even better to those you love, cuz now they can see the full you :)))
He should have addressed it right on the spot.
"Ooopsie johnnyy was just texting me back because i helped him move some furniture for his nee house"
At this point i think hes just gotta drop it and ignore it. Pretend it didnt happen. If he tries to cover his tracks now it'll be too obvious that hes lying
I was outed before I was ready, and that was a hard bandaid to get ripped off. I got kicked out of my house and was temporarily homeless and living off of friends couches.
The world isn't as sweet as the movie makes it, not all queers get the "love, simon" treatment when they're outed. You can't change the minds of the people around you, even if they are your parents, that's their own journey to go on. You, or whoever this is meant for, must live authentically as yourself, pull up your bootstraps, and prepare for war on life. Live and survive as best you can, and do your best to avoid the people who try to bring you down. You get to choose your family now, choose the people who love and support you as you. And when times get tough, remember, nothing is as rad as getting your petty revenge by living your best gay life free from homophobes. It can get better, but you gotta work for it.
