until my paranoid personality disorder starts telling me that everyone is a kgb agent here to take my diastolic blood pressure. then it’s too much to deal with
where it's like, "i hate everyone and everything, but i also thrive off of negative energy so i kind of am in this limbo of feeling really terrible, but getting to feel that anger/depression/anxiety is also really pleasant"
well, i don't find that experience relatable and don't commiserate with me if you do because i wouldn't have anything further on the topic. this is a purely hypothetical blog, as i don't feel or experience emotion like you humans do. but i have heard of such counter-intuitive things being possible.
