The Rules: we each write three words back and forth until we make a story
The Story: The Attack of the Lesbian Cesar Salad (friend's title lol)
One day, a lesbian woman walked into a McDonalds to buy a salad. She was trying to slim down her figure so she decided to not act like a fat ass, and buy a decent cesar salad. As the woman was waiting for the salad to be tossed and served, she went to the bathroom to fix her Kate Gosselin-style hair cut and her camel toe.
She left the bathroom and the salad was all ready for pickup. She took the salad and sat down at a small round table at the back of the restaurant. She opened up her salad and as she opened it, a voice said, "Hey." The woman was confused as to where the voice was coming from. She looked around and did not see anyone in her proximity. Then the voice was mubling something.. She couldnt understand what was being said.. "EAT MY LETTUCE BITCH," the voice said clearly. The woman looked behind her and saw nothing. Then a squirt of cesar dressing hit her in the face. She looked down at the cesar salad and noticed the lettuce of the cesar salad resembled lips and they were moving as if someone was speaking.
"Hey sugar lips, care to munch on me? Im one crisp and fresh salad," the voice said in a very low-pitched tone. Sorry for squirting my dressing on you," the salad continued as the woman took a napking and wiped the thick white dressing off of her face.
The woman got angry and started yelling at the salad. "YOU ARE NOT REAL, you are just another salad im gonna get my hands on and savor.
Then out of nowhere the salad jumped from the bowl and started kissing the woman's face. As the woman ripped off the salad from her face, She noticed that the salad was actually a woman. The woman took a knife and started stabbing at the angry salad. The salad yelled in anguish "BITCH YOU DONT MESS WITH A SALAD, YOU ARE DEAD FIRE CROTCH"
So the salad transformed into a A Lesbian Cesar Salad monster and took a fork and pulled the woman's pants down and shoved a fork into the va-jay-jay of the poor defensless woman.
The salad monster slapped the hell out of the woman. Then the salad knocked the woman to the ground and was holding the fork above the woman's throat and said: "BITCH YOU ARE LESBIAN AND SO AM I, I COULD SPOON YOU, BUT IT CANT HAPPEN. I WANT TO EAT YOUR SALAD AS YOU WILL EAT MINE"
The woman then kicked the salad monster off of her and kicked it to the side. The woman then said: "Salad monster, you worthless piece of lettuce, They dont have lettuce abortions? Why dont you do yourself a favor and drown in some dressing"
The Salad Monster took the woman by the throat and choke slammed her to the ground.
The Salad monster took a breath and said "SO WHY DID YOU ORDER A SALAD, BECAUSE YOU ARE A FRICKING LESBIAN?"
The woman said as the salad monster stabbed her with a knife "Im only a vegetarian"
