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Episode 7: The Biggest Snatch

Topic » Episode 7: The Biggest Snatch

2380 days 17 hours ago
mahogany
SURPRISE ladies! We're taking a week off from the World Trade Center to go to the BIGGEST SNATCH RANCH! Trust me it's for your own good.

Here your impersonation skills will be pushed to the LIMIT with rigorous exercise, diet and strategy to see who has the biggest snatch.

So for this runway you must impersonate a celebrity -- think long and hard on this choice. PLEASE NOTE that the celebrity does NOT need to be obese; it may be easier to pick one as far as answering the questions, but you're also allowed to fatten up a celebrity who isn't for the runway, as long as I can still tell who it is.

You will also have to send me written answers to the following questions IN CHARACTER - this is the comedy portion of the challenge.

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?
2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)
5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?

Your scores from your runway and answers will be added together to calculate your weight at this week's WEIGH-IN on the runway tonight.

Two (or more) girls will fall below the yellow line, they will have to lipsync to the following song (there won't actually be a vote TROLLED):

2380 days 17 hours ago
mahogany
(Btw yall have 48 hours like always)
2380 days 10 hours ago
HighNoon
I'm Melissa Joan Hart! Animated witch and fearer of GOD

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks? The gays are papi bad and black people are also icky, so I want an irrelevant blonde little miss pop star like myself.

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise? I just stop eating for TEN whole seconds/use black magic with the flick of my fanger.

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist? oo some nice SOUP, just water chicken and SALT

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver) I am pregnant with ten children! ABORTION IS WRONG

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line? I will cast a spell on them! ooo spooky! Aunt Hilda! Our scheme to rig the Biggest Loser is failing! I need the spell to make me slim thin again!
2380 days 9 hours ago
Queenisha
1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?

Well, 9/11, I am a whole lotta woman and I do like my chocolate, so I would love Dolvett handle all these curves.

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
I have a little secret you see, I always tell my dance girls that its not enough to just vomit after you eat but you have to BEFORE as well.

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
I love eating children’s hopes and dreams.

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)
SICKLED FEET. STRETCH THOSE TOES

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?
I would bribe them with extra dance lessons and if they dare vote me out, THEYRE FALLING TO THE BOTTOM OF THE DANCE PYRAMID.
2380 days 8 hours ago
dawnpeacly
Amanda Bynes

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?

Neither of those queers, but do you know who can? Drake, god he can MURDER my vagina anytime!!! *begins to foam out of mouth*

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?

One word... Kegel.

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?

*points at deli hagress*

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)

Nothing can convince my ways... *slowly brings out vibrator, staring and winking at 9/11* Call me.

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?

*Whips out vodka bottle* YoU cAnT hAvE a PaRtY wItHoUt AmAnDa ByNeS!! *passes out*
2380 days 8 hours ago
dawnpeacly
Skarlet Skeleton: Snatch Game https://imgur.com/a/jtqXf
2380 days 6 hours ago
Mitchkid64
Jessie from Toy Story

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?
ohhhh Bob could make me be his horse and ride me all day YE-HAW FUCKBOY! After the show maybe we could grow some chickens together, I’m known to be good at raising cock.

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
Jessie the Cowgirl went to town do-dah, do-dah. She bought a crate of Ipecac, all the do-dah day.  I’m Gonna drink it all night, gonna drink it all day. Just like that I lost some weight, all the do-dah day. chugs a bottle and immediately begins throwing up A-mmm I a s-s-s-size eight y-y-yet? falls over

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
I was told that I am what I eat, so skinny bitches better beware. Jessie’s in town and hungry…

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)
I went through a time when i thought my bosoms were just part of my stomach it all meshed into one, I don’t want to go back there cries and in mid cry pulls out a candy bar and starts eating whilst still crying

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?
OH well country girls can get some work done and they ain’t afraid to get down an dirty. Actually lookin’ round here I gotta say anyone of these girls could enter me like flight 175 into the twin towers. puts legs on the stand in front of her in an open position Unlike Chick-Fil-a on Sunday, my legs are always open for business.
2379 days 13 hours ago
TheOmen
Up next, Drag Race Royalty, it’s Stacey Layne Matthews

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?
Oh Henny, if you know me I like my meat dipped in some chocolate, some dark Hershey chocolate, so Dolvett.

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
Henny I’m not in the gym. You know how much money is a gym membership? ITS A LOT FUCKING MONEY! (chuckles)

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
Ohh Henny if they gave me some KFC chicken this what I’d do gurl. https://youtu.be/OQwSg03f2vU

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)
I have these big titties Henny, them titties give me my money Henny. So Breast Cancer, gurl I cant handle evening gowns them hospitals give you anyway, I think they couture but others no so much gurl.

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?
Gurl I’d do nothing. I’m so thick and fat that they’d keep me on longer just because of my size gurl.

Look: https://imgur.com/a/hnwOg
2379 days 12 hours ago
Blingbae
1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?

*hits deli hagress with a ladle* dolvett is MINE, you period blood guzzling WHORE!

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?

usually ill just- *pukes up moldy carrot and then eats it* -do that before i exercise.

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?

ive eaten nothing but toothpaste for the past ten years, thinking it was ranch dressing, and now i have intestinal problems. *sobs while eating toothpaste from her purse*


4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver,)

my vagina. i always pee all over my spanx; it's a disaster.

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?

*pours vodka into an empty water bottle and stares off into the distance*
2379 days 12 hours ago
Blingbae
^ kim k
2379 days 12 hours ago
Blingbae
look: https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B-Uu7rXdU7UZT09pWm5lRmswUzQ

cf: this is inspired by the kim k break the internet look !
2379 days 9 hours ago
rollingderp
https://imgur.com/iZ9JOfm (but fat)
Mrs. Lovett from Sweeney Todd!

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?
Dolvett. He seems very nice and plump. Nobody is better than Mr. Todd, though. I want to have a nice life by the sea, and occasionally we can do a guest in~!

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
"What I calls, enterprise. Poppin' pussies into pies!"

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
I think the obvious choice here is pie. *looks into Queenisha's general direction* and I know exactly what kind of pie that would be. *licks lips and stares* I know a good barber for you, boy.

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)
I mean, either way it's going into the pies. Nothing can change my ways, but the worst would probably be a shriveled, old fallopian tube. They're a bitch to cook.

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?
Death threats. Saw how well that worked for Judge Turpin. *starts to throw knife at queenisha and is stopped by security*
2379 days 4 hours ago
ashszoke
Hello, my name is South Tower and I will be impersonating Khloe Kardashian https://imgur.com/gallery/xkalH
My trainer is obviously Gay Bob! He reminds me of our family’s friend Jonathan, and it feels more comfortable having him remind me of someone I know http://i.perezhilton.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/khloe.gif . My last chance work out obviously consists of me running up and down stairs and going on a treadmill while watching basketball games and figuring out which one to fuck next https://media.giphy.com/media/PCGRHUn7Crce4/giphy.gif . I definitely wouldn’t be able to resist pizza, I love it! My mom says not to eat it but I do what I want https://fat.gfycat.com/RegalSelfishIberianchiffchaff.gif there’s always vegetarian pizza I could eat. Dr. H is probably gonna show me Kim’s cellulite to keep me motivated because god I don’t want that much cellulite on my ass, I’d literally starve myself and workout all day everyday if my ass had that much cellulite. Since I’m what they call the fat Kardashian, he can also just show me my sisters and I’ll be motivated so I look better than them. First off there is no way I’d fall below, I’m a hardworker and I will be losing that weight. In the off chance I do end up below I’ll obviously be using my tits to get guys to save me, and I’ll act like a mother to the girls so they want me in as someone to lean on https://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/thumbor/JxuiajDc2EpvXODpjPeHYpylURo/fit-in/1024x1024/filters:format_auto-!!-:strip_icc-!!-/2016/06/27/879/n/1922398/e9ac9bdd60264ee2_13/i/When-You-Werent-Sure-About-Wearing-Revealing-Outfit-Winter-Say-Screw-Rock-Anyway.gif
2379 days 3 hours ago
Zuelke
https://imgur.com/a/I4i4D

Hello, I'm Hillary Rodham Clinton!

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?  Since all of them are constituents of mine, I don't want to show favoritism toward any of them.  As long as it isn't Jillian.  There's only room for one lesbian in this joint.

2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
A little game of Pokemon GO-TO-THE-POLLS.  But in all seriousness, I think I would round out my workout by prancercising to Red Lobster, because I'm a classy bitch.

3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
A good ol' slice of New York pizza!  I grew up enjoying the taste of authentic, New York style pizzas in my hometown of Chicago, Illinois.  So aromatic! 

4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? An anatomically correct heart.  Oh, we're talking about weight?  I'd say any one of Monica Lewinsky's four stomachs.  Fucking gluttonous cow.

5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?  I would probably tout some rhetoric about 9/11.  I was on Ground Zero when the plane hit the South Tower!  See how enticing that is?  And when I factor in my superdelegates, it turns out I actually don't have to convince anyone at all!  *cackles and starts seizing* https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FormalTatteredAphid-size_restricted.gif
2379 days ago
Halloween
My celebrity is Margot Frank

https://i.gyazo.com/16d2a3710cf3fa81fd10004f34a4054d.png

1. Who is your trainer, Bulldyke Jillian, Gay Bob, Dolvett, or one of the irrelevant blonde chicks?
Gay Bob because he is fucking hot and i wanna lick his pussy before i get sent to the gas chamber
2. When you're doing your LAST CHANCE workout how do you exercise?
id run on the treadmill away from the nazis
3. It's a temptation challenge... which delicious food would you not be able to resist?
latkas and bagels because im jewish
4. Which deathly-looking fake body part will Dr. H show you to convince you to change your ways? (eg smokers' lung, fatty liver)
my hair because its hella ugly
5. How will you convince the others to vote to keep you if you fall below the yellow line?
because adolf is going to kill me soon and ill be removed soon anyway

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9/11's Drag Race - SEASON 2

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