There once was a scientist. An Evil Scientist. An Evil CONFECTIONERY Scientist. Dr. Peach Fuzz.
http://i.imgur.com/KjBNnBV.png She was on a quest for world beverage domination (and motherhood), so she made her own vending machine/daughter. Her name was Mango Squeeze (.5% Fruit Juice). Mango was made to lure in men with her unique marketing strategy. Pressing her left nipple gave you a regular can of Mango Squeeze, and her right nipple gave you Diet Mango Squeeze.
Mango Squeeze (.5% Fruit Juice) made so much money for her mother. Dr. Fuzz was so happy at how her daughter whored herself out for Dr. Fuzz's benefit. Dr. Fuzz's motto for Mango was "After you've played with a slut or two, drink a refreshing can of Mango Squeeze!"
But one day, Mango Squeeze (.5% Fruit Juice) wanted to make money for herself, so she installed a Slot Machine into her system.
"How dare you whore yourself out for someone other than me! I didn't raise a SLOT... machine. Harlot." Said Dr. Fuzz when she found out. Needless to say, Mango was disowned. But due to the slot machine she'd installed and the recipe, marketing strategy, and readjusted tagline ("After you've played a slot or two, drink a refreshing can of Mango Squeeze!"), she made lots of money. And Dr. Fuzz was bitter, as usual. The end.
Mango Squeeze (.5% Fruit Juice):
http://i.imgur.com/1YUrzWY.png 
