So Turkeylover has given me a list of movies to watch. This list is long and watching them would probably take a good portion of my life to do. But I have no backbone, and no spine, and he watched a nice comedy movie I told him to so I owe him one. Also he puts up with me so I owe him more than one.
He is forcing me to make blogs about my experience as well, so maybe Smallie's reviews on these movies can influence your decision to watch them.
So I started with The Descent this morning at 5 a.m, and The Descent 2 at like 9 a.m.
So the movies are... well interesting.
So the first film was cool. It started off with this crazy ass death that came out of the blue. I was like "What?". Truly bizarre. This random death is important to the story though.
So now this chick is like "my family dead let me go on a vacay with the girls". So they do that and go cave dwelling. This movie has nothing happening for the first hour. And I was like "I did not sign up to watch a poor girl deal with PTSD and trauma". Then these fucking creatures show up. v
Let me tell you, those things are kind of skinny. I liked them.
Then you have this Juno girl that the movie is trying to make into a villain. Like I get it, if they weren't being attacked by the creatures I would hate the bitch. But she's seriously out here trying to survive so there's no real reason to want root against her. Let's just get out of the cave alive and then be like "Juno, girl, you are a bad friend".
Anyway the ending was so ass that the second movie ignored it.
The second movie was like "Hey, girl, you are in a hospital. You okay?" and she's like "I don't know. I don't remember".
So the cops are like "let's take you to the scene of the crime cause we're responsible".
So she goes in there and is like "oh shit, I remember. I was attacked here by these creatures".
Let me tell ya, the Americans in this movie are so dumb. The first movie is full of British ladies, but this one introduces Americans that ruin everything.
Anyway, they come across Juno in the cave. I'm just like "girl is in here killing off some beasts and still looking good and fit". I wonder what she ate.
Also some monsters shit on them.
Anyway, the main girl from the two movies is like "Juno, forgive me." So they forgive each other, sort of. I won't spoil it though, even though I've spoiled a lot lmao.
Now this movie's ending was also super shit. I think these fools can't make an ending. I kind of liked 2 more than the first though if I'm being honest.
The Descent 4/5 Smallie Stars.
The Descent 2 3.5/5 Smallie Stars.
Now I know I said the Descent 2 I liked more, but listen, I can like it more and realize it's not as good. Fucking get away from me with your harassing opinions.
Lemonface and Turkeylover, I'm expect a full apology from you BOTH! I was starting to get recognition for being an iconic straight man on this site, and you fucking two had to come and ruin it. You've both made a powerful enemy today. I might not have the instant top blog power that you have Lemonface, but I have something that you don't! Male privilege. Your time as tg's queen has come to an end!
1. Last beverage: Coke. Which I know is kind of bad.
2. Last phone call: Not my doctor lmao!
3. Last Kiss: Sometimes my dog will stick his tongue in my mouth. That always repulses me tbh and I wish I would get a warning from him before he did it.
4. Last song you listened to:
5. Last time you cried: It wasn't long ago. I can't remember off the top of my head. I think maybe three nights ago? I was having a mental breakdown over the fact that I had to grow up. This is so sad and embarrassing lmao.
HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice?: No.
7. Been cheated on?: No.
8. Kissed someone & regretted it?: No. I don't put my tongue on crazy.
9. Lost someone special?: Unfortunately...
10. Been depressed?: Yes. Won't tell that story though lmao.
11. Been high?: On life. LMAO! Jk. I've been high on pain medication but only because I needed pain the meds. I've never been high for recreational purposes nor do I plan to be.
LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS:
12. Green
1*. Blue
14: Orange (low key but I also hate it)
THIS YEAR HAVE YOU:
15. Have you made new friends this year: Yes
16. Fallen out of love: No. I don't really believe that I've been in love this year though tbh.
17. Laughed until you cried: Yes. Turkeylover does this all the time to me actually.
18. Met someone who changed you: Yes. I've listed so many and many of them have been on tengaged but I can't tag them all. You all know who you are.
19. Found out who your true friends were: What kind of creepy ass question is this?
20. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes, but not in a bad way.
21. Kissed anyone on your top friends list: No?
22. Are we skipping 22?
TRUTH:
23. How many kids do you want to have: One, but I could see myself being so happy with one that I get two. I actually have a really tragic Batman like story for my future son but I don't want to get into that now.
24. Do you have any pets: Yes. A ho cat and a German Shepherd dog. He's my buddy and I've never been so close to a living animal before.
25. Do you want to change your name: No. I'm good with what I have.
26. What did you do for your last birthday: Quarantine.
27. What time did you wake up today: I'm not sure. 10 a.m maybe?
28. What were you doing at midnight last night: No clue!
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: I will feel too embarrassed to nerd out tbh... I'm a huge nerd and I hate the person that I am.
30. Last time you saw your father: 5 or 6 years ago? Feels longer though. Idk. Not really looking to see him again either.
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: The older I get the less I want to change.
32. What are you listening to right now: Nothing.
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: LMAO! Yes.
34. What’s getting on your nerves right now?: Needing to copy and paste every single question for this shit.
35. We skipping 35 too?
36. What's your real name: Um. So it's not a secret or anything but I kind of like the enigma that is my name.
37. Relationship Status: Single.
38. Zodiac sign: Aries
39. Male or female: Male.
40-42: I am not answering these questions.
43. Hair color: Brown, but it is a lighter brown.
44. Long or short: My hair? It's short, but it does need to be cut cause of this quarantine shit.
45. Height: 5'11.
46. Do you have a crush on someone: Crush? I don't think so. I am attracted to certain individuals in my life though.
47. What do you like about yourself: I think how hard I work. I actually am a super duper hard worker and I kind of low key wish people would praise me for it more often... :(
48. Piercings: Nope.
49. Tattoos: Nope.
50. Righty or lefty: Righty.
FIRSTS:
51. First surgery: I haven't had one. I've had like, operations that I was awake for but I don't know if I'd call them surgeries.
52. First piercing: None.
53: First tattoo: None.
54. First best friend: God.
55. First Sport: Track and Field. Then Cross Country.
56. First pet: I had these cute little scotty dogs when I was a little lad.
57. First vacation: Fuck if I know. There's been a few and idk which was the first.
58. First concert: Fuck, I can't remember the name. They were some weird indie group and I was super small.
59. First crush: Fuck if I know.
60. First alcohol drink: I don't know to be honest.
RIGHT NOW:
61. Eating: Nothing.
62. Drinking: Coke.
63. I’m about to: Finish this list.
64. Listening to: STOP ASKING ME THIS.
65. Waiting for: Lord death to take me.
66-68. We just skipping?
WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE PREFERRED SEX?
69. Lips or eyes: Very much depends. I kind of have a thing for lips though and the way they can feel. Moving on.
70. Hugs or kisses: I'm a VERY good hugger I've been told. But if we're talking about sex then kissing.
71. Shorter or taller: Doesn't matter.
72. Older or Younger: I prefer within the ball park with my age. Although there was a milf in her like early to mid 30s in my college course who was honestly flirting with me a little and I was kind of into it...
73. Romantic or spontaneous: Spontaneous.
74: Nice stomach or nice arms: Stomach.
75: Tattoos or piercings: Tats. Let me see that tramp stamp girl.
76: Sensitive or loud: Like... in bed? Wtf? LMAO! Depends on the mood I guess.
77: Hook-up or relationship: Relationships but there is something intense and interesting with hook-ups. Not that I have ever partaken in such a scandalous thing.
78. Trouble maker or hesitant: Give me the trouble.
HAVE YOU EVER :
79. Kissed a stranger: No, I gotta know you if my tongue be on you.
80. Drank hard liquor: Sadly.
81. Lost glasses/contacts: Yes.
82. cried in front on someone: Yes. And fuck you for making me have a sad ass memory play in my head.
83. Broken someone’s heart: Sadly...
84. Had your own heart broken: Yes, and I hate to be "that guy" but I'm certain most people who would say yes to this actually haven't. Being sad about a breakup and genuinely having your heartbroken are two totally different things and I seriously hope no one EVER has to go through that.
85. Been arrested: No.
86. Turned someone down: Yes.
87. Cried when someone died: Yes. Worst is when it's someone way too young that you're close to that went way too soon... still kind of in denial about some of those ones.
88. Liked a friend that is a girl: LOL. Yep!
DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
89. Yourself: Yes
90. Miracles: Yes
91. Love at first sight: No.
92. Heaven: I don't know. I want to.
93. Santa Clause: Yes. Malachite05 wouldn't lie to me about his existence.
94. Kissing on the first date: If it's not forced upon some poor ass person then yes.
95. Angels: Yes. I think.
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
96. Is there one person you want to be with right now: Yes
97. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time: No. Have maybe been "seeing" a few people at once but only when it's in the beginning stages and nothing is serious.
98. Do you believe it's possible to remain faithful forever: Yes.
99. What’s the one thing you cannot live without: I can live without anything. I'm not reliant on any one thing, bitch!
v
Malachite05
I was offended to see Paul028 rank me low on Turkeylover's 1st page of friends.