A couple of days ago, don't ask me when exactly, the wonderful USA goalkeeper, Hope Solo, was taken hostage by the American police forces. Since this time, a desperate hostage situation has taken place, with Hope's foes circling her at all sides. Jealous of her fame and great tits, Hope's sister and nephew have accused them of assaulting them.
Verified sauces, Heineken's ketchup and KFC's sweet and sour, confirm that Hope's sister and nephew are actually demons sent from the Illuminati to take down USA's number one. Even more disturbing are the murmurs that Rihanna is circling over Solo's prone state, still fuming years after Chris Brown slapped her down for telling him he couldn't dance.
With matters as they are, hear my plea. Hope is innocent, and without her, we lose, well, hope. Please, join my cause to free Hope Solo from these deceitful liars.