I DID NOT COME UP WITH THIS. I STOLE THIS IDEA FROM DONAAM.
if i call your name, please step forward
lux.
brand.
rakan.
ornn.
you 4 are safe and may leave the stage. the rest of you represent the tops and bottoms of the week.
twitch (defeat): so i had a toxic support who called me garbage all game and i was getting fucked by a xayah/rakan and went 0/11. like i literally got a D. so.
taliyah (victory): me and my girls riven, elise, and kayle were being mentally abused by our toxic heteronormative partiarchal garen but he put his big boy britches on and focused and we all outscaled the enemy team.
neeko (victory): ugh, i snapped once again this game. fortunately my team was good too. bitches were flashing to kill me thinking i was a 10 health xayah and then id ult and kill them. i feel like im the only neeko player in bronze who uses her passive.
warwick (defeat): i put so much pressure on every lane and was getting kills at 3 minutes. but i can only carry a kai'sa who doesn't know not to last hit ur red buff and a full AP qiyana so, so far.
zoe (defeat): literally this game was complete torture. i was laning against ahri and she would not let me get dark harvest stacks, she wouldnt let me get my spell shard thingies, she wouldnt let me fucking exist. i was already playing this game in a bad mood and i was fucking irate.
xayah (defeat): ok i said last game was complete torture but this one's right up there. first of all our gnar kept dcing and was sitting at 2400 ping. secondly, morgana and jinx would chain cc me to death over and over again and lux would just sit there missing qs. ive come to the conclusion that lux is literally the most low impact support in the game and im just not going to play her support anymore unless im filled. bc this one was garbo.
i have made my decision.
taliyah, this week you snatched my stone-weave. condragulations you are the winner of this week's challenge.
neeko, you're safe.
warwick, you're safe.
zoe, once again when put to the test, you portal jump into defeat. im sorry my dear but you are up for elimination.
twitch, your gameplay this challenge was...stinky. im sorry my dear but you are also up for elimination.
that means, xayah, you're safe.
two champions stand before me. twitch, zoe, this is your last chance to impress me and save your nexus from explosion. good luck and dont fuck it up!
lipsync: ignite by zedd with TWO d's, not one
*twitch seizes to the beat*
*zoe tries to grab an ignite spell shard but catches her lace front ablaze*
i have made my decision
twitch, shantay you stay. you may join the other champions.
zoe, my dear, i really, truly hate to see you leave so soon. that's how the cookie crumbles sometimes. no matter how you place, you will always be the iconic aspect of cancer. now, sashay away.
*zoe tries to grab an ignite spell shard but catches her lace front ablaze*