Welcome to Bootleg Opinions! I'm Rita Bitch, and I'm about to read some bitches.

----------

EPISODE 0, PART 1: Entrance Looks:

First up: Ruby Velvet, if you please!



💎 I like the red and white color story, but I think the flowers take away from that. I would've used red and white roses, like the Queen of Hearts. Still, it's well done. TOOT!

-----------

Is that an XBox? No it's, Plai Statión!



🕹️ First off, girl...you need to talk with HR about Talian's homophobic pixelation. Now, as for this look, I don't like it. It's too simple, and needs to have more of a drag edge to it. BOOT.

-----------

Floating 29 miles south-southwest of Long Beach, it's Catalina!



🐱 I don't know why, but this outfit bores me. Maybe I just hate this shade of pink. It's not bad by any means, but it's a soft BOOT.

-----------

Get out the jammy dodgers, 'cause it's Zsa Zsa Tea!



☕ As always, the designer has very good taste! You're like something from Cirque du Soleil, or a drag production of A Midsummer Night's Dream. TOOT!

-----------

She's a kind of magic, Avra K. Davra!



🪄 I have to admit that I'm not personally a big fan of this bubblegum pink color. Aside from that, though, I really enjoy this ruffle bondage fantasy. TOOT!

-----------

Her historical existence is unconfirmed, it's Eden Gardens!



😇 I think the color choices here are interesting, but it feels a bit simple and flat for me. I like it, but I think I was expecting just a bit more. Unless you're trying to pull a Willow Pill with this look, in which case I stan, but otherwise it's a soft BOOT

-----------

The Jorgeous of Georgetown! It's Talianna Thee Icon.



🇬🇾 I'm on the fence with this one. The dress is just a bit too messy for me. It doesn't look deliberate enough. You always look stunning, but I'm afraid this is a soft BOOT, emphasis on SOFT.

-----------

Hiding with her family behind your refrigerator, it's La Cucaracha!



🪳 THANK YOU for saving me from pink hell with this neon yellow! And smart thinking bringing in your own food so you aren't forced to eat the Talian's Drag Race brand Nutrient Rich Sludge™ like everyone else. TOOT!

-----------

Feeling tired? Anita Nap!



🛌🏼 Okay, TO BE CLEAR: The reveal in this look is physically impossible. YA CAN'T HIDE YOUR TENTACLES UNDER LATEX, ANITA! However, I think the outfit is bold, and shows why Talian brought you back. TOOT.

-----------

Top toot for the entrance looks is...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
ZSA ZSA TEA! Butterfly me to the moon!

TREND ALERT: Pink Pandemonium. For a bunch of gays, you sure do like a vaginal color scheme.

----------

EPISODE 0, PART 2: Promo Looks

First up, we have Talianna Thee Icon!



🇬🇾 This is a stonecold STUNNER, a cosmic Egyptian goddess! I can't think of anything to change or improve for this look. TOOT!

----------

Up next, La Cucaracha!



🪳 "I'm going to take up the ENTIRE cast photo, and you can't stop me!" -La Cucaracha, 2022.

I really don't think all the extraneous crap surrounding you was necessary, because the dress and the hair stand on their own. You have an occasional tendency to overcomplicate your looks (remember the teapot), and while the detailing can be impressive, sometimes simplicity is desirable. Regardless, this is still a TOOT.

----------

Up next, Catalina!



🐱 I'm really not getting this one. All the elements are somewhat interesting on their own, but they don't combine in a visually appealing way. I can barely think of anything to say, except one thing: BOOT.

----------

Up next, Avra K. Davra!



🪄 I'm loving this! You're like a renaissance clockwork automaton. Only possible changes I should suggest is that the skin and the clothes are a bit too close in color. Darkening the skin or lightening the clothes would've helped the contrast a bit. As it is, though, it's still a TOOT.

----------

Up next, Eden Gardens!



😇 This is a major improvement from your entrance lewk. I like that you went with white gold, because regular gold would've been too much for this dress. It's a TOOT.

----------

Up next, Zsa Zsa Tea!



☕ Okay, so here's the basic gays' (*cough* Jerry *cough*) reaction to this look:

Now, onto MY take. You have the same tendency towards overcomplication as Shadi. Now, you may get applause walking down Twinkies Avenue, or highpitched squeals on Tamar Boulevard, but right now you're walking down BITCHSTREET, USA. Many queens have tried, but NO ONE has made it to the end of the block! Make no mistake, I can't boot this because it gets a lot of things right, but in my book it's a soft TOOT. Fight me.

----------

Up next, Anita Nap!



🛌🏼 I understand the Charlize Theron evil queen aesthetic, and I think it's a lovely look, but I don't feel it's as memorable as other outfits on this runway. Pretty, but it's a soft BOOT.

----------

Up next, Ruby Velvet!



💎 You look like a statue in a temple in Thailand. Divine! TOOT!

----------

Last up, is that a Nintendo Switch? No, it's Plai Statión!



🕹️ This one's a bit simple, but I think a bit of simplicity actually helped you this time when compared to some of your competitors. TOOT!

----------

Top toot for the promo looks is...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
TALIANNA THEE ICON! Let me join your cult!

TREND ALERT: Gold.

See you next week.

Welcome to Bootleg Opinions! I'm Rita Bitch, and I'm about to read some bitches.

Episode #1: Category is: HAIR TO THE GAWDS! Why are we yelling?

----------

Up first, it's Talianna Thee Icon!



🇬🇾 The outfit alone is great. We love an African moment. But even beyond that, I think you were the only one who really did something worthy of the title "HAIR TO THE GAWDS". That dancing sculpture is iconic, and I'm surprised that you were the only queen with a reveal. TOOT!

-----------

Next down the runway: Eden Gardens!



😇 Gold mixed with any color goes well, and this is a nice pink. However, it doesn't read "HAIR TO THE GAWDS" to me. The wig isn't the standout piece, so you sucked at that game. Still, it's a soft TOOT.

-----------

Next up: La Cucaracha!



🪳 The coloration and texture of the hair in your outfit is so flat, it doesn't really read as hair, and that means that you look like you're wearing a pretty, but boring black gown. Rather than "HAIR TO THE GAWDS", you look more like you're being attacked by the Venom symbiote. It's a soft BOOT.

-----------

Coming to a theater near you, it's Anita Nap!



🛌🏼 This is nice and stylish. You're like a recently widowed French socialite whose husband did NOT die of natural causes. The hair is much more ambitious than your competition, which was the main point of the challenge. TOOT!

-----------

Is that a Gameboy Advance SP, with a backlit screen? No it's, Plai Statión!



🕹️ I think you fulfilled the assignment of HTTG. It's not the biggest, but it's interesting. You look like you're part of the Boseman, Montana local theater production of the Lion King. We stan your support of the arts, but I think a little more embellishment would serve you well. I almost want to give it a NOOT, but that'd make the charts more confusing, so I'm giving you the SOFTEST possible BOOT.

-----------

Here she comes! It's Avra K. Davra!



🪄 This dress is WONDERFUL. However, this green wig isn't doing much for me. It feels like you had this outfit that you wanted to use and you threw on a green afro to fulfill the HTTG requirement. Still, the dress saves it. TOOT!

-----------

Zsa Zsa Tea, making her way downtown!



☕ I love an arts and crafts moment. Only real issue is I think wig should be even BIGGER, or at least more vertical. Right now, you look like you're wearing an overcooked McDonald's hashbrown on your head. You could've had a Bride of Frankenstein wig, with rainbow stripes rather than white. Regardless, it's a nice look. TOOT!

-----------

Finally, we have Ruby Velvet!



💎 At first glance I liked this look, but I noticed issues as I looked closer. Now, let me explain. This look basically has four elements (no, not water, earth, fire, and air): The top, the sleeves, the boots, and the hair. All of them look nice individually, but not together. The top looks like you're on a mariachi swim team (and I mean that in the most complementary way). The sleeves are that inflated trashbag look that we all love. The boots are straight out of a discotheque. The hair and makeup is obviously very fun and colorful '80s. Forgive me, but this is a solid BOOT.

-----------

Top toot for week is...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
TALIANNA THEE ICON! She's hair to make it clear!

TREND ALERT:



Remember Utica's lesson: If you can't grow it naturally, wearing one is a hate crime!

See you next time!

Purrrr thanks maam!

Yass congrats Talianna ❤️