I meant Jake as Paymaster

You can see how invested I am

Gather 'round children, light the damn kinara for it is truly a Kwanzaa ruiner to see Clara Janine’s lumpy ass STILL IN THE HOUSE at the FINAL 9. First off I guess is that it is time to congratulate Jake for adding UNPREDICTABILITY and SURPRISES to this game, because in my dream world, I would have nailed Jake, Bryan (where the fuck is that one, by the way?) and CLARAHAG as my bottom three housemates without any regard to inactives or drama queens or Brians.  And god help me when I run for President of the US and this post comes back to haunt me, but I honestly worry that I would have slapped the shit out of Clara Janine at some point if this game was in real life. There's something so basically infuriating about Clara Janine/mahogany/Ruffles that a more articulate Noah would be able to unspool and articulate, but this is drunk ass Noah and can only say I HATE HER.   We simply cannot talk about Clara Janine without referencing her ~repeated~ comments in Will’s Survivor telling someone who voted against her to commit suicide which make CrimsonEnnui look like the leader of the goddamn Bully Whips.

I mean yes, I understand being bitter and mad at me, but NO MA'AM if you think you're going to be able to lie straight to my face and not get called the fuck out when I realize you’re full of shit AND SOME OF YOU REALLY TRIED IT. Clara Janine was compelled by her demon overlord to try and tell me that Jake/Bryan/Brian are running the game and we need to get them out, but she spent like 20 minutes glopping on mascara and praying to her demon overlord for the strength to act nice in front of me during the conversation. That conversation was the dumbest, fakest shit ever pulled on Tengaged, and to make things worse, all y’all are convinced I’m a bigger snake than Clara Jane, like OK.   Are we honestly going to pretend that it’s a smart move to be a rat in a game which has public votes? Sure, Clara Janine probably has safety and a new alliance (scratch that, Clara Janine is in a FAKE alliance, bank on it), but your shepherd Jake will not always be able to provide for you. Clara Janine, you need to learn some real-life skills, and you need to ACTUALLY start playing the game in a smart manner, or else you'll just get voided next week.  CLARA JANINE I AM *DONE* WITH YOU.  oh and I respect Jake’s game lol.  Oh, and bye everyone! :).

OK I'm starting.

Hell everyone, I am the Paymaster and I have a job to do. I'm going to waste too much time talking, I'm going to get straight to it.

Jay, you are the only one of the three who has not even attempted to talk to me. I don't know if you just feel safe or are trying to give up to further certain people in this game. I have no issue with you even if you are constantly telling people things about me to try to get me out of the game. I'm going to give you this first check. We'll see how our relationship goes from here. Congrats.

Now it comes down to Andy and Noah...two big players in this game who I would have different reasons to void.

Andy, I believe you are a stronger overall player than Noah. You're social, you're very likable, you're good at challenges. You're not on anybody's radar yet, but you are a very good player and Noah has made a good case for you to get voided.

Noah, it's no secret we are not allies in this game. You have openly targeted me the last few rounds, with good reason, but now you're promising me the world. It's hard for me to believe everything you say because of how vocal you have been against me in the game. You seem to just be telling everyone what they want to hear. But you do make a point that you are a target and could easily be voided in the future unlike Andy.

At the end of the day, I have to do what I think is best for me moving forward.

Andy, come get your check.

Noah, I have chosen to void you. This should come to no surprise, I've practically let you know this would happen because this is how I was leaning. You did plead to me and I respect you a lot for not giving up. You are a big player in this game, but you were vocal against me and it's impossible for to try and forget the things you have said about me. Good game.

Good Game Jake <3

Oh I never made it official but *Jake smashes that mf check 22 hours ago*