1."Haven't I seen you before?" == "Nice ass."
2."I'm a Romantic." == "I'm poor." "I need you" == "My hand is tired."
3."I am different from all the other guys" == "I had an accident in The War."
4."I want a commitment." == "I'm getting evicted on Friday."
5."You're the only girl I've ever cared about" == "You are the only girl who hasn't rejected me."
6."I really want to get to know you better." == "So I can tell my friends about it."
7."It's just orange juice, try it." == "3 more shots, and she'll have her legs around my head."
8."She's kinda cute." == "I want to have sex with her till I am blue."
"I don't know if I like her" == "She won't sleep with me."
9."I miss you so much" == "I am so horny that my male-roommate is starting to look good." "Was it good for you?" == "I'm insecure about my manhood." {also called the 'did you notice??' response}
10."How do I compare with all your other boyfriends?" == "Don't make jokes about Mr. Happy!!"
11."I had a wonderful time last night." == "Who the hell are you?"
12."Do you really love me?" == "I've done something stupid and you might find out."
13."I have something to tell you." == "Get tested."
14."I'll give you a call." == "I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again."
15."I've been thinking a lot." == "You're not as attractive as when I was drunk."
16."I think we should just be friends." == "Your ugly."
http://www.tengaged.com/design/id-18522/russian-roulette-eyepatch
http://www.tengaged.com/design/id-18499/angel-wings