1) For starters, this list is being read at your funeral.
2) Your package starts growling.
3) Goo starts leaking out of the package seems.
4) Its one of those snow globes and the fun is already gone by you shaking it early.
5) The message of "This Box Will Self Destruct in 30 Seconds" sends everyone in the house into a mild panic.
6) Cause the words "Shake Well Before Opening" were nowhere to be found on the wrapping paper, that's why!!!
7) No one will want a Busch Cold Beer now for at least an hour or two.
8) You just made your new goldfish think it was a typhoon and he has now thrown up in his bowl.
9) Cause somehow you've activated the Furby and it won't f*&$#@% shut up!!!
