1) Has to let all other dogs know about this nasty "fixing" process.
2) His master Simon hasn't said to stop barking.
3) Using longer lasting Duracell batteries.
4) Because he hasn't eaten that poison you slipped in his food.
5) Having a long ass conversation with the neighbor's dog on the other side.
6) Having intense debate with Afghan hound over whether wet or dry dog food is better.
7) Telling funny story about how he was out one time, trying to do his business and some car came by, honked the horn and it didn't scare the shit out of him!!!
8) Turns out neighbor doesn't have a dog but left his "Dogs Barking" CD on continuous play.
9) Secretly plotting with two other Rottweilers to plot and kill that damn Gordita dog.
10) He ain't getting any and if you weren't, you'd be barking about it too!
