Bye Felicia

Posts 182 posts

why have i been rankedvote Jul 9, 2020
500th for the past like month
someone put me back at 504th it's my favorite
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180 Jun 24, 2020
Kinda funny how so many of us grew up rly respecting our older users like Bluelagoon506 and then we stayed on here long enough to realize they're all fucking bitter psychos with no lives wtf :/
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179 Jun 14, 2020
I’m thinking 10 or 6 because they’re shorter than the modern seasons but are there any better ones u would recommend?
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178 May 22, 2020
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177 May 20, 2020
Lets try to have a productive conversation about p3d0ph*lia on TG. This is a LOOOOONG one I'll have a TLDR at the bottom.. Pls comment your opinions, I'm not trying to fight anyone or say this is the definitive guide on how to act.

I think it's important to think about why this website makes it so easy for sexual predators to operate. Yes it's important to call out these monsters and make sure they know that their actions are not welcome on Tengaged. Yes it's important to urge friends of those people to speak up before something really disgusting happens. But if we can recognize damaging behaviors before they happen then we can avoid how nasty the blogs page gets in the aftermath of these accusations.

First of all I think old TG definitely dropped the ball in creating a place that pedophilia was inexcusable. Yes we knew that Peeps and J*sseM were doing all this gross stuff but it took YEARS to get Peeps banned and J*sse.... that disgusting pig is going to come back whenever we forget about this so he's here forever. I think dynamics were way different back then - there was sort of a divide between old and young on this site. As a 14 year old I could find a boyfriend on Tengaged since I couldn't find one irl, and I think a lot of people my age shared that idea. The problem with that was my introduction to boys was over the computer, so a lot of us quickly realized that was a pretty damaging strategy to finding real love. Still, our relationships were within our age for the most part and internet relationships aren't necessarily the problem. If a creepy old man wanted to prey on me, I had more than enough friends my age to talk to and I could easily and safely ignore people.

At the same time we had The Actives which really was just a way for Peeps to meet young boys. I saw a lot of old friends join that group and I never really spoke to them again, and I didn't understand at the time that they were in potential danger. Because the age gap was so real, it was perfectly normal to have friends who were more than double your age like gagaluv or Diva1. But we never had to worry about the matriarchs of TG being dangerous (and they actively looked out for us for the most part) so there weren't too many HUGE cases of gross things... The point is that a few years ago it was super easy to find a boy on this website and it was very regular to have friends who were WAYYY older than you & talk to them on a daily basis. This wasn't a very bad thing at the time, it just would have been better if we had recognized the specific problematic people early on.

Okay let's fast forward to messy ass 2020 Tengaged.... I'll be honest and say that I haven't read every single blog about predators, just the ones that are at the very top and the ones that are FUCKED UP. Personally (and you don't have to agree) I think we got here because of users like myself who normalized being horny on the blogs page. I think that the idea of finding a boy on TG never went away despite most of us growing out of that phase.

The age demographics definitely changed... I would say that when I started TG in 2010 it was probably 50/50 in terms of who was above and over 18. Today it looks more like 75% are above 18 and 25% are below 18 but idk yall are still messy. Growing up on this site I had so many people around my age that I could talk to, but today if you're 14 years old and just joining the site you're bound to become close with quite a few people who are much older than you. So I think we got here by normalizing the fact that you can find a boyfriend on TG if you can't find one irl and by normalizing close relationships with huge age gaps.

Sooooo what the fuck do we do now about it yall! There are quite a few things IMO...
- First things first (and I'm the first one who needs to stop this) blogs page horniness just isn't cute anymore. It makes people think this site is a place to meet your new boyfriend and it just isn't.
- If you're in a chat and you notice 2 people becoming very close despite a concerning age gap, just check in on them both. We know what grooming looks like and we know what sexual predation looks like, so if you notice concerning behavior between friends then don't be afraid to step in. For the sake of your friend and everyone's safety, please please speak up before something really bad happens. That being said you can still be friends with older users, just be careful when you talk to people who are much older. If they start mentioning anything sexual get out while you can because there is absolutely no reason for someone over the age of 18 to talk about anything sexual with a minor.
- We all gotta recognize that grey areas exist. Sorry if this is problematic but an 18-17 , 18-15, and 40-15 age gap relationship are all VERY different things. We should treat them all differently while always making sure to listen to victims! And learn your terms. Pedophilia is not child pornography which is not grooming which is not sexual assault which is not sexual predation. They share similar characteristics but if you're going to accuse someone of a crime, make sure it's the right one at least.
- Dragging the friends of these users is just stupid.... If we're going to make a web of friendships on this site then we're all connected to a p3d0

TLDR: We need to stop being horny and disgusting, look out for your people, you can still be friends with TRUSTED adults on this site because they can be amazing people, learn vocabulary, and stop trying to call out friends of these people lmao they did nothing compared to the psychological damage inflicted by these predators.

Christian_ bamold1999 kindred7 some ppl who i've chatted about this with briefly! and koolness234 would really love to hear your thoughts!!

Gonna definitely have to include multiple EDITS because some of this blog is not 100% PC and I don't want my point to get lost..
EDIT 1: I'm not saying women can't be or haven't been guilty of any of the above. I didn't want the point of this blog to be "stay away from all older users" and based on MY experiences, I knew growing up that I could talk to Carolyn if I ever felt unsafe and honestly I did like 7 years ago. Women aren't immune from this but for the sake of providing suggestions I wanted to give a shoutout to people who have tried to create a safe place, from what I've seen firsthand!
Points: 624 31 comments