Hello, my name is Judith, Judi, Camille, Shennellica.
Funny, isn't it? The way memory works. The things you can't quite remember, and the things you can never forget.
The way I see it, there are two different kinds of death. If you're lucky, you live a long life... and one day your body stops working and it's over. But if you're not lucky, you die a little bit... over and over... until you realize it's too late. I know some of you might think there was more I could have done, or should have done. But I'd lost control. And in that moment, it felt like... it felt like I was already dead.
Am I dead? Or is this one of those dreams? Those horrible dreams that seem like they last forever? If I am alive, why? If there is a God or whatever, something, somewhere, why have I been abandoned by everyone and everything I’ve ever known? I’ve ever loved? Stranded. What is the lesson? What is the point? God, give me a sign, or I have to give up. I can’t do this anymore. Please just let me die. Being alive hurts too much.
Check my blog: http://tengaged.com/user/JudiCamille
