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Big Brother and online Hunger games.

[S1E3] The Real Dead Housewives of Roblox

Sep 27, 2021 by Zuelke
#TRDHOR

CAST:
Batya Batya
Brea Eaurea
Bryan Eilish
Bryce spacebryce
CJ ceeej
Caleb CalebDaBoss
Charlie xcharliex
DJ #Kelly2722
David Dracarys
Dev DaddyDev
Devin ThyArtIsGrin
Donny BigBrotherDonny
Eddie NicoleF
Edgar chibideidara
Eric RightToCensor
Ethan DawnPeacly
Hunter hujain
Jenna JennaValentina
JL Delete2544
Joey joey96
John Jxhn
Johnny #Aquamarine
Josh doobee
Justin Girllover101
Lance rozlyn
Lilly ZLilly831
Marwan 2388
Mason Zuelke
Pokepat Pokepat
Ray GentlemanG
Sandy Hash
Sim SomebodyAwesome

Episode 3
The Meetup

The Redstar Estate was abuzz with the conversations of all the members of the Roblox chat, for the first time in person.  All had arrived except Edgar and Marwan.  Lance paced back and forth in the kitchen, eyes glued to his phone where he alternated between spam calling each of the missing guests.  The sun was still high, but if they didn’t show up before everyone got bored, then all the meticulous planning Lance had done would have been for nothing.
       
        Sandy sat in the living room with Caleb, Eddie, Ethan, Johnny, JL, and Mason.  They were all discussing the most recent season of Survivor when they were suddenly quieted by the sound of breaking glass coming from the kitchen.

        “I’ll go see what that was,” Sandy said.  He excused himself from the living room and entered the kitchen, where Lance was now kneeling on the ground shoveling a broken martini glass into the trash.

        “What happened?” Sandy asked.

        “Look,” Lance said.  He turned his phone to Sandy, showing Edgar’s Discord profile.  “He just went from Online to Do Not Disturb.  I’m done with him!  Why did I ever think that he would show his face here?  And I mean LITERALLY show his face.”

        “I’m sure he’ll be here soon, Lance,” Sandy said coolly.  “He wouldn’t lie.”

        Lance’s phone began to ring.

        “See!” Sandy exclaimed.  “I told you.  He’s probably right outside.”

        “That wasn’t a call,” Lance droned.  “It’s my five minute timer letting me know that it’s time to switch and start harassing Marwan now.”

        “Who cares if they aren’t on time?” Sandy asked. 

        “Well, I wanted to make it a surprise…” Lance began.  “...but I’m going to host Outlaster.  I have everything planned out for it.”

        “Oh…”

        Lance’s brows furled.  “What do you mean, ‘oh’?”

        “Nothing!” Sandy assured.  “I just didn’t know this meetup was going to be an LRG.  I was hoping it would be a regular, drama-free meetup.”

        “Tough luck,” Lance replied with visible annoyance.  “I did not spend hours planting idols around this house to change my mind.”

        Sandy opted not to pry him about it.  Although it was a disappointment that the meetup was not going to be as relaxed as he anticipated, he figured it would still be a good time.  He decided that he would volunteer to be voted out if his tribe ever lost a challenge so things wouldn’t get heated between his fellow Roblox Rinnas.  After all, the drama between then often got personal, and it would probably get even uglier in real life.

        Meanwhile back in the living room, the topic changed from Survivor to the whereabouts of Edgar and Marwan. 

        “Let’s be real, did we really think Edgar was coming?” Mason said.

        “He is such a coward,” Johnny moaned.  “I was looking forward to seeing his face.”

        JL giggled.  “You’ve been obsessed with seeing Edgar’s face for awhile now.”

        “Can you blame me?” Johnny asked.  “He’s known you guys for years.  At least you all should have seen what he looks like.”

        “I’m not shocked that Edgar isn’t coming,” Ethan said.  “I am a little shocked that Marwan isn’t here, though.”

        “He said he was coming without a doubt,” Mason responded.

        “Ladies, do we think Marwan might have gotten eaten by zombies?” Eddie asked.

        “That’s not funny, Eddie,” Caleb muttered.

        “I’m just saying!” Eddie chortled.  “It is a possibility.”

        “If Dev were here, I’d have thought you were trying to piss him off,” Mason said.

        “What’s so bad about getting eaten by zombies?” Ethan pondered aloud.  “That would be an awesome way to go out.  Just like, swarmed by five of them at once and getting devoured.  That’s how I wanna die.”

        “The next person who says ‘zombies’ will get a pound of anthrax sent to their fucking house,” Lance said as he stamped into the living room, trailed closely by Sandy.  “There are no fucking zombies here.  This is supposed to be a fun event, so I don’t want to hear any of the zombie bullshit.”

        “You sending yourself a pound of anthrax?” Mason asked.  “You said the next person to say it will get a pound of anthrax, and then you said it like four times right after.  You know, I learned from my eighth grade drama teacher that you can send yourself a document in the mail and it will automatically be copyrighted.  I don’t know if it’s true, but it sounds real.”

        “Mason,” Lance exhaled, pressing his palms together.  “I love you, but shut the fuck up.”

***

Three hours after noon and still no sign of Edgar or Marwan.  Eric had broken off from talking to CJ and started exploring the house.  He found a stairwell that led to the basement, which appeared to be a wine cellar.  Wooden casks lined the walls on either side of him, and at the end of the room were shelves of unopened wine.  Eric crept forward before he was startled by a figure materializing from in between two of the wine casks.  It was just Donny.

        “You scared the shit out of me!” Eric wheezed.

        “Don’t tell anyone about these,” Donny said, holding many necklaces that dangled from his fingers.  From each of them hung an emerald-green totem the size of a fist.

        “What are those?” Eric asked.  “Immunity idols?”

        “Yeah,” Donny giggled.  “Lance is hosting a game later, so I’m ruining it.”

        “Really?” Eric said with an upturned lip.  He was as annoyed that a game was happening tonight just as much as he was that Donny was trying to ruin it, which he had a habit of doing.  “Why do you have to troll all the time?  I swear, sometimes you’re worse than Eddie.”

        “I heard my name,” Eddie said, creaking down the stairs behind Eric.  Eric groaned.

        “Don’t tell him!” Donny pleaded.  “It will be so funny.  Are you Team Good Feeds or not?”

        “I won’t mention it,” Eric said.  “Only because this place is massive and I don’t have the energy to run around looking for Lance.”

        Donny smiled and scurried away, leaving Eric and Eddie alone in each other’s company.

        “So…” Eddie said, cutting through the awkward silence.  “This is a wine cellar, huh?  Maybe I’ll have a sip of it.”

        “It isn’t your wine, Eddie,” Eric barked.  “I don’t think Lance was even told about this part of the house.  All of this belongs to the owners.”

        “Can’t we be nice to each other for just one day?” Eddie said.  As the words left his lips, he wondered to himself why he even asked.  Eric and Eddie had hated each other for a long time, and that wasn’t changing with one trip to Texas.  Still, it would help to look like the diplomatic one if their beef escalated any further that day.

        “How am I not being nice?” Eric snapped.  “All I said was that you shouldn’t drink the wine that doesn’t belong to you.”

        “Maybe you should drink some,” Eddie suggested.  “It’ll help you relax a little.  Clearly you’re tense about something.  Is it your flopping album sales?”

        Eric’s face went red.  He had just released his second album last summer, and it broke his first album’s iTunes sales in just a week.  He had sold well over a thousand already.  The earnings were still modest, nothing for someone to drop their day job over, but the sheer number of new fans he’d gotten had surprised him.  It felt like he was on a steady track to becoming an artist of wide renown.  And yet, despite his achievements, Eddie still had a way of breaking him down.

        “This conversation is over,” Eric said, brushing past Eddie.

        “But I’m not done talking!” Eddie taunted.  “This isn’t Discord, Eric.  You can’t mute me when I say something you don’t like.”

        “One day, Eddie, you’re going to say something that you will really regret,” Eric remarked as he ascended the stairs.  “And when it happens, I will be laughing my fucking ass off.”

***

Half past five.  Lance had fallen asleep keeping watch for Edgar and Marwan by the window of the foyer, the stem of an empty tequila glass hanging loosely between his two fingers.  John walked past and noticed Lance dozing drunkenly by the front door, and shook him awake.

        “H...huh?” Lance mumbled with eyes still closed.

        “Wake up, Lance,” John said.  “You’ve been AWOL for the whole meetup.  I wanted to hang out with you a bit before I left.”

        Then Lance’s eyes snapped open.  “What?  No!  You can’t leave yet, the party’s just getting started!”

        “I have to take an early flight tomorrow back home,” John said.  “I’ve already spoken to everyone I can here.  It was fun, but it’s getting kind of stale now.  I can only take so much of Charlie and Hunter bickering like an old married couple.”

        “I’m hosting Outlaster in a bit,” Lance blurted, grabbing John’s shoulders.  “Just stay!  All I need is for Edgar and Marwan to get here and we can get started.”

        “Lance, it’s nearly six now,” John said.  “It’s safe to say they aren’t going to be here.”

        Lance fumbled with his phone and hastily messaged the both of them.

        “Seriously, though, this was fun,” John continued.  “I’d love to do this again next year, maybe with a more, shall we say, intimate guest list.  We could do without the Justins or the Davids.”

        Suddenly, there was a soft rapping on the front door.  Lance peered at the door, then craned by the window to get a look at who was outside, but his vision was still blurry from a mix of alcohol and sleep. 

        “Is it them?” Lance said.  He leapt to his feet with the grace of a baby horse and opened the door.  Standing before John and Lance was a tall and mysterious man.  He was not mysterious for his North Face jacket that swallowed his plain white shirt, nor his blue jeans were tucked inside a pair of Timbs, nor his earrings that twinkled from within his mess of curly black hair.  It was the mask that covered his face.  It wasn’t like a surgical mask that covered one’s mouth and nose, but one that covered his entire face, an elaborately detailed Greek comedy mask striped with white, black, and red.  Its smile chilled both Lance and John.

        Lance was just tipsy enough to believe he was in the middle of an early 2000s horror film, and he backed away from the open door.  Before he could shakily threaten the anonymous man that he was going to call the police, a warm voice spoke from behind the mask.

        “Sorry I’m late,” he said.  “I hope the meetup isn’t over.”

        “Edgar?!” John and Lance exclaimed in unison.

        “Yes, it’s me,” he confirmed.  He stepped into the foyer, and Lance retreated back further, still feeling guarded.

        “Why are you wearing that mask?” John said.  “I thought we were about to get murdered.”

        “So did I!” Lance chuckled.

        “Ohhh,” Edgar said with a nod.  “That’s why you bitches were rude as hell.  It’s not like you would’ve known who I was without the mask.”

        “I’m sorry,” Lance said.  “You can’t blame me, though.  That mask is fucking nuts!”

        “Well, it was nice to see you, Edgar,” John remarked.  “In a way.  But I’m off now.”

        “Wait!” Lance exclaimed, grabbing onto John’s arm.  “Just stay another hour.  I need you here to start this Outlaster.”

        “Outlaster?” Edgar said.

        “...I need twenty-eight to start.  I’m not waiting for Marwan to get here.  Please, just stay one more hour.  You can volunteer to be voted out by that time.”

        John thought for a moment, and surrendered to Lance’s plea.  “Fine,” he sighed.  “I’ll play for a bit.  Just to help you get it started.”

        “LISA!” Lance howled joyfully.  “If you don’t mind, could you two help me gather everyone here to the front room?  I have something I need to set up before we get started.”

        Over the next ten minutes, all the guests filtered into the foyer.  Lance stood at the front with a bag full of red and blue buffs. 

        “I think that’s everybody,” John said, following Pokepat into the foyer.

        “Great!” Lance said.  “So I know the meetup has been dying down a bit and most of you are ready to leave, but we’ve only made it to the halfway point of the night.  I have a secret game that I’ve had planned ever since I decided to host this meetup two years ago.  We’ve had nearly half a decade now of drama, backstabbing, and strategy, but now it’s time to see which one of you is truly the best player of them all.  Tonight...you all will be playing the first ever Outlaster: Roblox Rinnas All Stars!”

        The group met the enthusiastically delivered announcement with silence and indifference, save for a halfhearted “Yay!” from Sandy.

        “Why are you just telling us this?” Lilly asked.

        “Because, LILLY, I didn’t want the gamebots of this chat, i.e. YOU, to ruin it by pregaming,” Lance retorted.

        “Johnny and I can’t play,” JL said.  “I already ordered a Lyft for us to go to our hotel.”

        “No,” Lance responded plainly.  “Playing is not optional.  None of you are going anywhere.”

        “Girl I have a callback for The Challenge 749 tomorrow,” Brea added.  “I’m not missing that for an Outlaster.”

        “Like I said,” Lance said, eerily calm.  “None of you are leaving.”

        His command fell upon deaf ears as some of the guests started shuffling toward the door. 

        “Guys, come on,” Sandy pleaded.  “Y’all stay up ‘til three in the morning every day.  Why can’t you just stay and play this game?  I’m sure it won’t even take that long.”

        “Yeah, and I just got here!” Edgar pointed out.

        “No one is going to force me to do anything,” Bryan retorted.

        “What if I give you a hundred dollars?” Sandy replied.

        “I’ll take a hundred dollars,” Josh offered.

        “I think he was asking Bryan,” Mason replied pettily.  “Is your name Bryan?”

        “Shut the fuck up you ugly troll,” Josh barked.

        “Why does everyone keep telling me to shut up?” Mason remarked.  “Like, I get it, everyone hates me and doesn’t want me to speak.  But you don’t have to remind me all the time.”

        “I’m sorry, Lance,” CJ said, his back facing the door.  “But I don’t think the energy’s there for an Outlaster.  I’m ready to get a break from these bitches anyway.  I’m leaving.”

        CJ turned and pulled the door handle, but it did not give.  He pulled it again twice.  Was it stuck?

        “I swear, gay people can’t do anything,” Jenna groaned.  “Let me try.”

        Jenna yanked the door handle, but still to no avail.  Everyone at the door turned to face Lance, who stared back at them through the keychain he held menacingly in front of his face.

        “Like.  I.  Said.  No one is leaving.”

Comments

Still no air time
Sent by Girllover101,Sep 27, 2021
masterpiece
Sent by Hash,Sep 28, 2021

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