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Big Brother and online Hunger games.

Life's Dope :)

4thJun 26, 2020 by Rocketokid13
Hi <3 if ya don't know me by now, I'm Billy. 20 years old from Melbourne Australia, work as a labourer, want to do music for a living. Been my dream for a while.

If you're close to me, you know that mental health has been a huge, huge, huge issue for me. Last year I was on the verge of ending my life, not knowing the repurcussions, not able to find anything positive about myself. I felt completely and utterly hopeless, and I wanted to end it all. Just say goodbye.

Through strength, and through the support of my family and friends I'm standing here today. Through the lesson of being able to love myself without relying on others, I'm able to say that I've so so happy with where I'm at in life. And I'm so glad that I've met some of the most amazing people I've ever had the pleasure to talk to through here and in real life.

2020 has been the worst year of my life, period. In March, I lost two of my closest mates to mental health related issues. Nothing felt worse than thinking about if there was anything I could do. Which is why I make it my goal to make people shine, to see the light in themselves and show that they have all the support in the world. Now that I say that, I just wanna say ghrocky100 (Alex), you're an absolute fucking legend mate and I love you so so much. You're amazing, everyone thinks you're amazing, and that will never EVER change.

Back onto it, I've had time to grive, grow and learn. So many things have happened since then. Corona, George Floyd, The Black Lives Matter movement and the Trans Right's issues. I'll say it out right, before everything happened I was a full advocate of 'All Lives Matter' thinking that it was simply based on equality. I don't think I've been more dead wrong, and I'm so grateful for my piers (ESPECIALLY nikw98) for teaching me what it means, the systemic racism that goes on and what more I can do to not only be more accepting of others, but fight for the people that I love and the pain and suffering they go through every day. I can genuinely say to ALOT of people that I've never been more thankful for them to guide me into being a more dope person.

Dope, my favourite word. Because that's what life is when it comes down to it. You're lucky to have it, and it sucks sometimes, but I'd rather you be here. Everyone does. If ya don't mind, I gotta thank a few people. There's too many to fucking name, and I'm more than happy to talk to anyone that I missed, but there's a few stand outs.

C_Shizz96 , the love of my life. My queen and someone who if you had asked me four years ago that a gay man a few years older than me from VIRGINIA** would become a role model and one of the greatest companions a man could ask for, I'd say you'd be kidding yourself. However, Miss Anastasia, you have never failed to lead me in the right direction, and more importantly make me laugh harder than anyone else. You have no idea how much you mean to me, and I'm grateful for you every single day.

Beccajo16, you were the first person that I met when I came back into this god forbidden dumb ass site Late 2015, and almost five years later you have continued to be the absolute goddess I know and love. You never take shit from anyone, and you teach me to be more assertive, hard working and above all kind.

The Whole of Chifula ( M_Davis1998, RainbowKing, Caleb9211 (and Cassie), NopalitoLegend01, TotalDramaLover1234), you have been my rock ever since this group formed. Every time I come on and chat with you guys, whether it be about something serious or we're fucking around (or if we're playing BASKETBALL) I feel safe. More importantly, I know that I've never been more grateful for a group of mates in my entire life. I promise you all that I will come to meet you when everything is over.

nutmeggiee, Megan Mother Fucking Humphries. Where do I begin with you? We meet in Discord Whodunnit, and we clicked instantly. You have never, ever failed to have a dull moment with me, and even though we went through a rough patch I consider you to be one of the most pivotal people I've met in my life. You teach me that it's okay to be a little bit of a mess as long as you have fun, and I tell you that there is no bitch more loyal and supportive of the people close to you than you. I can't express how much you've spiced up my life, and more importantly taught me that...well, life is dope.

but seriously fuck you megan humphries.

Thumper91, Lauren. My god. LAUREN. I can't say enough good things about you to prove my point that you are without a doubt the most golden hearted person I've come across on this site. The kindness that I try to show others is modelled based around how you treat others. You have never failed to make me smile, and that will never finish. I will always be loyal to you, and I hope you understand that I'll always be there for you.

Finally, someone who isn't on this site. Krissy.

yep i started crying here. fuck me in the ass whilst you're reading this stream Delete Forever by Grimes cuz it's a BOP

Krissy. You are the best thing to happen to me this year, if not for a long, long time. We've had some preeetty rough moments absolutely, and yes we've both been very very messy at some points. But you, more than anyone else, have shaped me to be a better person. You are strong, a badass, loving, intelligent, hilarious, I can go on all fucking day. You have brought a light into my world that's helped me learn about myself and my limits, and help me break them every day. I love you so, so much and I can't think of anyone else that I'd rather have as my best mate. I could go on all day but this blog is already long as fuck.

To anyone, ANYONE that is struggling, I've felt it. SO many people on this site have felt it. So many people have gone through injustice and their rights stripped from them, have had to come out, have had to live without a home or without a family.

It's okay not to be okay.

I stand with you. I stand for those who need help in any shape or form, and will try my absolute best to do exactly that. I may not be perfect, but no one is. Anyone reading this, message your best mates, tell them why you're grateful then. Kindness goes a long way, and you might just make someones day.

That's it for me. I love you all so so much, even if you don't know me feel free to message me. I'm always here to listen or chat <3 I will make an effort for you. We all will. However, you need to put in an effort for yourself as well. Self Love is the best kind of love. No one gives a fuck about how you look, it's 2020. Why do you think I keep continuing to talk to ThisIsMyGame? (fkn love you Keaton never change). You are beautiful, amazing and strong.

You are worth fighting for.

Comments

I love you Billy <3 never change. You’re an incredible person inside and out
Sent by nikw98,Jun 26, 2020
KING!!! I love you sm and am always here for you. <3
Sent by pinkiepie512,Jun 26, 2020
👑 you’re always a King Billy! Sometimes that crown may slip a lil like is does to the best of us, that’s just when you ask someone to re-adjust it for you 👌
Sent by Macda27,Jun 26, 2020
I love you so much billy! You are an amazing person and I’ll be here for you no matter what! Ily!
Sent by RainbowKing,Jun 26, 2020
You are an absolute joy and an amazing man. Thank you for your kind words and you know I’m always here for you whenever you need ❤️ Love you boo 😘
Sent by beccajo16,Jun 26, 2020
king❤️
Sent by ashszoke,Jun 26, 2020
Legend ❤
Sent by TheSexiestDude990,Jun 26, 2020
well said billy, glad you're doing better mate and you're looking mighty fine in them pantaloons
Sent by BengalBoy,Jun 26, 2020
Awww you‘re amazing!! Love ya so much, King Billy!! ❤️❤️
Sent by NopalitoLegend01,Jun 26, 2020
Love the icon that is Billy. Keep being the infinite ray of sunshine from down under king!
Sent by RealJacksonWalsh,Jun 26, 2020
LOVE YOU BILLY. I’m so happy I met you, you’re such a positive and uplifting person. I’m glad you’re doing amazing ❤️
Sent by Birks4444,Jun 26, 2020
<3 you Billy, meeting you in Perception was one of the best things to happen to me!
Sent by schmooboy,Jun 26, 2020
I love you so much billy <3
Sent by ghrocky100,Jun 26, 2020
<3 king
Sent by Allison,Jun 26, 2020
KING
Sent by Paige54,Jun 26, 2020
Love you billy <3
Sent by M_Davis1998,Jun 26, 2020
You are so brave for posting this on here, I am so thankful to be your friend and I love you dude. Always here for you <3
Sent by TotalDramaLover1234,Jun 26, 2020
Kinggggg <3
Sent by NicoleF,Jun 26, 2020
I'm glad you're in a much healthier mental state!
Sent by skyler1822,Jun 26, 2020
IM FROM VIRGINIA
Sent by C_Shizz96,Jun 27, 2020

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