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Big Brother and online Hunger games.

It's not as simple as that

1stMay 29, 2021 by Admir
If a close friend asks you for help admitting they have pedophilic thoughts, would you really just say ''FUCK OFF WEIRDO''? For fucks sake, those people need help. If they are your friend and they haven't acted upon their sexual disorder, you should advise them to seek help and explain to them the consequences of not seeking help. Ignoring the problem doesn't solve it. People forget pedophilia is a psychiatric disorder that has been classified as such and ignorance is not the good way to deal with it. With the adequate support, they can be PREVENTED on acting upon their sexual malfunctional desires. Do not confuse that with the situation on Tengaged or any other social media, where banning such users is absolutely adequate because that's the way to stop such behavior and should be enforced.

Comments

you're always so woke omg
Sent by gabrieltrezza,May 29, 2021
king
Sent by iiGalaxyii,May 29, 2021
I agree with you
Sent by Lemjam6,May 29, 2021
Idk what happened but yuppp
Sent by peace123,May 29, 2021
I was going to comment something very similar to this
Sent by DaveLooney,May 29, 2021
My T-prom date 😍
Sent by Kindred7,May 29, 2021
Robert guac and jessem for instance was obvious pedos for years Where were there close friends???? They were just ignoring the behavior.
Sent by unkown,May 29, 2021
I agree with you 100% this is the correct take. HOWEVER, I would not want to associate myself with set person EVER. Encourage them to seek help is definitely important.
Also those who are “Okay” with being around a pedophile should also seek help because that is not normal.
Again I agree with your approach but I would never associate myself with that person ever again.
Sent by Willie_,May 29, 2021
EXACTLY!!! People who fucking shrug off their own friend like that WITHOUT even hearing the full story, or what the person in question has to say, are absolute morons and fake SJWs. HEAR out everything people have to say first, thank you.
Sent by RedFabFoxy,May 29, 2021
^ If it's in unclear situations though, like if it's obvious what happened then it's disgusting. But with what YOU said in the blog, I completely agree
Sent by RedFabFoxy,May 29, 2021
willie_ I understand the way you feel. Many people actually feel the same way you do and that's okay.
But you should know that if everyone stopped associating themselves w the set person, they would be left alone which would make them more likely to act upon their disorder. So, it's very important that people with such disorder have friends who would HELP them and advise them whenever they needed an advice. Being friends with a person who is a pedophile and succeeding to discourage them on acting upon their desires is a very brave thing to do, and that shouldn't be judged in my opinion. I know you're talking about people who ''dont care if someone is a pedophile as long as theyre funny smart etc'' though which I agree with because such friends don't help the set person at all and are actually making the set person feel as if their disorder is not a big deal. But yeah, I wouldn't run to cancel or judge someone simply because they are friends with a pedophile before I knew the background of such friendship. It's a very touchy subject in general.
Sent by Admir,May 29, 2021
I completely agree 100%. And the people who have the audacity to attack someone who doesn’t immediately cancel said friend are even worse. Like just Bc you’re getting someone banned for being a pedo Bc you don’t like them anyways doesn’t mean that their friends they’ve had for 10 years are just inclined to eliminate them from their life.

I’ve Always said that you want to see the best for and in your friends. If you have positive experiences with someone, that’s what you see them as. It’s not excusing that persons behavior. But each person needs to time to deal with it and I definitely believe that is more of a psychological thing that needs to be dealt with. Otherwise the problem will continue even worse than it already is
Sent by sjsoccer88,May 29, 2021
well spoken king
Sent by brightongal,May 29, 2021
i like you admir, but this just isn't it LOL
Sent by brightongal,May 29, 2021
well spoken king
Sent by brightongal,May 29, 2021

i like you admir, but this just isn't it LOL
Sent by brightongal,May 29, 2021
Sent by peace123,May 29, 2021
weird as hell
Sent by rollingderp,May 29, 2021
well spoken king
Sent by brightongal,May 29, 2021

i like you admir, but this just isn't it LOL
Sent by brightongal,May 29, 2021
Sent by RedFabFoxy,May 29, 2021
Should of stayed in the drafts
Sent by Batya,May 29, 2021
If a close friend asks you for help admitting they have pedophilic thoughts, would you really just say ''FUCK OFF WEIRDO''?

yes /endthread
Sent by HowLovely,May 29, 2021
lolno
Sent by mathboy9,May 29, 2021
i mean i get where ur coming from but if theyre truly have pedophilic tendencie and like came to me asking for help like id try to help ig uess. but literallly they all just act on it and dont do that lmaoo.

But also i think a lot of people on here people claim are "pedophiles" are not actually pedophiles they just do dumb shit like dont verify age/ carelessly send nudes
Sent by salmaan,May 29, 2021
salmaan people don't differ pedophilic from predatory behavior but since both are bannable, they are grouped into the same basket.
Sent by Admir,May 29, 2021
I see your point.

It from my discussion with some people on this site, the vast majority of them deny deny deny deny, and fail to demonstrate the accountability and self realization you mentioned here. The simple fact that they deny them is proof enough for me not to want to associate with those people. Furthermore, if for any reason having someone in your life is toxic for you then you have every right to cut them off.

Also what your proposing is highly situational and hinges on the fact that the predator is indeed in good consciousness seeking out help for their condition. Imagine a scenario where you trying to be a good friend remain friends with a predator and try to discourage their actions, but the relapse and prey on a child, that child despite your good efforts has now been subjected to a life changing instance. Now personally I could not live with the fact that, instead of turning someone in, I tried to manage their condition and it lead to another child being a victim of their behavior. How many instances of this is enough. You I think are describing a very special occasion that hinges on the thesis that your predator friend is indeed trying to get help. Furthermore I think it has a lot to do with the prison system, not being a remedy of their behavior but simply a punishment. It should not be the requirement or the prerogative of untrained psychologist to deal with someone whose addiction causes severe harm in any other person.

So simply put if a friend told me they had serious thoughts of continuing to prey on children, I doubt my unprofessional help, and friendship would personally in my mind prevent them from ever preying on child again.
Sent by koolness234,May 30, 2021
admir
Sent by koolness234,May 30, 2021
Gotta agree with koolness234 on this one
Sent by Eilish,May 30, 2021
koolness234 Thank you so much for your well written reply.

Yeah, what I have mentioned was a specific type of people indeed. I myself would not associate with those people who deny they have a problem when it's obvious and based on facts and proof. Therefore, I wanted to acknowledge that there is a variation of people within this group because there really are people who are self aware, based on my clinical experience so far.

Yeah, I was talking about the situation where predators are self aware and are asking for help. I had to bring it up because people forget that my scenario is very much possible and real, while the one you are speaking of is very well known and much more discussed, in my opinion. Also, you are speaking of a scenario which does not relate to the point I was trying to make because in that scenario, I would turn in the predator myself and only then, after the police and psychiatrists have taken it upon themselves, try to help as much as I can in consulation w those authorities. Because of what you have mentioned, I don't think anyone would take it upon themselves to be responsible for their friend and yeah in that situation there's no place for discouraging and advices etc. That scenario is different because someone has already acted upon their disorder, but as you said and you were right, I was speaking of a situation where they haven't acted upon it but are aware something is wrong, which still doesn't go far from what I meant to say. Even in my scenario, I said that you should insist on making those people seek help and make them understand the consequences. You cannot turn in someone without any proof, especially if they speak to you in person and not over written forms of texting. So in that case, doing something like encouraging them to seek help, discouraging them on acting upon their disorder and being a support system is the least you can do, but can be much more helpful than doing nothing in my opinion. I do agree that you should contact professionals anyway and ask them to educate you on that matter because you shouldn't feel responsible if a set person still follows w the act despite your efforts. It is not your fault, and the difference is that you can be a part of preventing the said act if you try to help. HOWEVER, those who do not want to associate with those people and who feel like they wouldn't be able to deal w this situation the best way have the absolute right to detach themselves from all of that. My point is that we shouldn't judge either of those in this kind of situation because both have their own reasons why they stayed or why they have not.

So, I'd strongly recommend to everyone to get even more educated regarding this matter to learn how to deal w it in different occasions. It is a very wide topic with a lot of different scenarios. I do believe not choosing to stay around pedophiles/predators definitely could be helpful to serve as a punishment, but I also believe that those who choose to stay and who are confident they could help shouldn't be blamed for it.

Let me know if you're interested for a further discussion! :)
Sent by Admir,May 30, 2021
Im so sorry but if my friend came to me and said they had pedophilic thoughts I would question why they brought it to me and not a therapist or other mental health professional.

Maybe I’m just a bad person but I genuinely don’t think I could just continue acting the same way towards a person who admitted that to me LMAO
Sent by konohavillage1,May 30, 2021
konohavillage1 because in that case it shows they trust you more than they'd trust other people. So then you could help by guiding them and assuring them that it's right to get help and seek professional. You have the right to detach yourself from them too, it's your life and your choice to make for yourself
Sent by Admir,May 30, 2021
Also no offense but your last comment reads more as like “not all pedophiles” and the only way I see your scenario happening is a situation where the person hasn’t acted on it yet and has not become a danger to minors YET. Even still, they really don’t need to come to me or anyone who is not trained in handling this, and I still wouldn’t feel like you’d be wrong to cut them out or at least reduce their role in your life. Would you really feel comfortable continuing to attach yourself and your emotions to a person who is a pedophile in every way but the actual act?
Sent by konohavillage1,May 30, 2021
admir I just feel like the guiding I would be doing is common sense. If the person is moral enough to realize that preying on minors is wrong, how do they not know to get help or find a therapist for that?

Maybe if I was actually in this situation I’d have a different feeling but it makes no sense to me from the outside looking in
Sent by konohavillage1,May 30, 2021
admir this is a well written blog. My take is that if I had a friend that was a pedophile and I had kids myself, I would definitely have to cut the off in fear they would want to hit my my 8 year old son or something. I think that your approach your stating there is definitely a lot of truth to it but its extremely circumstantial depending on the friend and their position in life. I think the best thing to do as a good friend is REALLY encourage that person to get help.
Sent by Allison,May 30, 2021
the therapy for pedos is jail LOL.
Sent by Colter,May 30, 2021
I completely agree allison. Very well said.
Sent by Admir,May 30, 2021
konohavillage1 Because those people could be scared to approach anyone else. And as I said, this is only one of the different scenarios that I discussed which people don't think of. I feel like different scenarios could have different solutions and I that's why we are discussing it.
Sent by Admir,May 30, 2021
I think id encourage them to get help but also distance myself from them

Also i think tg has a tendency to throw the term “pedophile” around a little bit too freely

While some instances have definitely occurred here i dont think many of these predators want to literally fuck actual pre pubescent children

Not to defend anyone who has had questionable interactions with minors but i do think there is an important distinction
Sent by lemonface,May 30, 2021
I definitely agree lemonface, I think i noted somewhere in the comments that people don't make a difference between pedophilia and predatory actions probably because they are both bannable
Sent by Admir,May 30, 2021
I think for me personally it's a little different, as the victim of a pedophile I know I could not be much help when it comes to helping someone in that situation get better, my opinions and point of view will always be biased and tainted in that respect because I've felt the pain they can /could cause. And the damage it does to the victims life.

However I do agree if they haven't acted upon those feelings, actively acknowledge its wrong and want help getting better I do believe they deserve that help and not to be judged whilst getting better. And I agree that people need to understand the difference between those who act upon the feelings and those who don't. I just know I couldnt be any help and I honestly would probably be more damaging to the process of them getting better.
Sent by captainzacsparrow,May 30, 2021
captainzacsparrow I am very sorry for what happened to you and I hope you are healing well. Everything you said, I agree with and yeah, I think you should do what is the best for your own life. Thank you for your opinion!
Sent by Admir,May 30, 2021

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